Get rid of stress for a few days in the style of LifeHack

Do I need to read this?

I specifically write about this at the very beginning. If you are not ready to act, if for you the Plan is just a little meaningful list of some actions - do not waste your time and do not read further. Further there will be “a lot of letters” and an author who will not motivate you. I'm serious.
Actively manage your life? Here is a simple and effective tool that can always be used.

Introduction

Every adult person is familiar with anxiety (stress). Sometimes we realize that this is something inside of us sitting, but we cannot determine what exactly we are worried about or what is actually the cause of our stress. This state of affairs worries us even more. Anxiety is a simple and ingenious system that feeds itself. The consequences of internal anxiety or stress can be listed for a very long time. I will focus on the main examples - increased fatigue, difficulties in relations with relatives, colleagues, low self-esteem, depression, periodic attacks of aggression, addiction to addictions, obesity, etc. Despite the fact that some of the possible consequences look like a diagnosis, they can be based on fairly simple factors that, when examined separately, will not cause us strong experiences (in the sense that they only begin to bother together).
Now that we have already been tense enough to understand that this is serious, let's change the subject and talk about our Peace of Mind.
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Definition - peace

Quite often, when it comes to peace of mind, we say that in the modern dynamic world it is impossible to achieve it, or “well, very difficult.” We like to refer to the need to greatly change the environment, change the country, earn “one hundred thousand millions”, get married successfully, just as successfully get married, change jobs, lose N kg in front and on the sides, or buy something big and noticeable from afar to gain this is a welcome calm. However, reality shows that such “acquisitions” do not bring peace of mind. More often, they bring additional difficulties and anxieties, and if the situation is the case, then it’s time to look at it from a different angle.

Perform "Calm"

Even the most complex project, on closer examination, is just a set of specific sequential or parallel tasks, nothing more. The same can be said about our Peace.
Let's present “Calm” in the form of a familiar object - a project, and we will execute actions that are standard for any project - we will write down tasks for its implementation (in our case, achievement). I promise that not only the result will be interesting, but the process itself.

You are an Egoist. And it is right.

The only condition for the effective implementation of the “Calm” project is to be honest and attentive to yourself at the analysis stage. Try to realize the true goal - Calm you need and no one else. Drop all the limits of decency, social obligations, turn off the conscience - you are a real egoist in this project, and this is RIGHT.

Security of personal information

The first thing to do is to protect a new document with a password. The map (about it later) that you compile is the most personal document. Show it in the form in which it will be compiled, it is not necessary even to the closest people to whom you unconditionally trust. She will probably touch them too, which is almost guaranteed to hurt them or cause misunderstanding. Do not complicate your life - close the document with a password, thereby ensuring your security. In the extreme case, if you need / want to show the card to a loved one, make a special copy that will not contain information about this person. This small strategic trick will save a lot of time and effort. Another important point is that when you know that your security is assured, you will map more honestly and openly.

What is the basis?

Our Calm Project is based on an honest and detailed analysis of our concerns. It is in the plural, because with careful self-analysis, they will be quite a lot. But don't let that frighten you. The more anxiety you find in yourself and transfer to the map, the better for the project.

And how to do it?

Divide and rule!

This principle for 4 centuries has remained a simple and logical basis for any large project. Our “Tranquility” is no exception. Create a skeleton of anxiety in the form of large thematic groups.

Example:
1. Work
2. Finance
3. Personal relationships
4. Friends
5. Family
6. Health
7. Life
8. Restrictions *
9. Psychology **
* Restrictions - that constantly creates obstacles for you - ignorance of languages, insufficient education, overweight, etc.
** Psychology - if you feel any difficulties in this area.
If you feel that it is better to add some other large subject groups - do it right away, because this is YOUR project, i.e. YOUR Calm.

Listen to yourself

Now we have a long and interesting way to fill our groups. In order to do this as efficiently as possible, you need to focus your attention on one group and fill it up until you catch yourself thinking that "here, perhaps, everything." After that, go to another group. Not necessarily the next, it is best to fill the group that you most want to fill right now. Listen to yourself and let your worries “call” yourself.
How to fill the group? Everything is simple - what is bothering you in this area.

The easiest way to give examples:
1. Work
1.1. The manual does not appreciate my efforts
1.2. The partner does not pay enough attention to the project.
1.3. Risks associated with ...
2. Finance
2.1. Low income
2.2. No short term buffer
2.3. No long term buffer
2.4. Inability to lend
And then for each group. It is important to note that it is necessary to build YOUR Tranquility project exactly the way you want. If you want to fill out the list taking into account the small things (Kohl, Tolya and Olya - they constantly carry my cookies) - do so. If you decide to fill only serious and global concerns - go ahead. As a result, most likely, you will get a certain mix, from global worries and certain trifles, which you clearly do not want to put up with. I repeat - do what is convenient for YOU. You are selfish. And it is right.

How long will it take?

At the stage of analysis - forget about the time factor. All you care about is to collect all your concerns in one place - in your map. It took me several days to create my own map, and 2/3 was filled out on the first day.

I think I finished my own map.

I am sure that you have done an excellent job and worked with interest, and now you have one of the most important documents for you in the current period of time. If you are attentive to yourself, then most likely you will experience several feelings at once, among which will be: self-satisfaction from the work done and ... the initial stage of Calmness from what you now clearly see what are the sources of your anxiety and stress. Do not forget - this is just a project, and your every concern is just a small part of the overall project. At this stage, do not include the emotional components for each item, there is no real need for this - this is just our list.

Recipe for Tranquility

In the world, everything is built on the simplest principles, and only we ourselves complicate everything. Let's try not to complicate anything, but simply take each of our concerns and assign him to very specific and doable tasks that will save us from it.

Examples:

Anxiety: The management does not appreciate my efforts
Solution: Pay attention to the management of their part of the work. Ask the supervisor to evaluate your assignments. Ask for recommendations for more effective implementation of tasks (everyone loves to distribute them and exalts the person who came to BAT for such recommendations). Find and read literature on this topic.

Anxiety: Partner is not paying enough attention to the project.
Solution: Frankly discuss with the partner the reasons for such behavior and try to come to a compromise, offer him help and support, express your vision for solving its difficulties. Do not forget that there is always some good reason for this behavior. It just needs to be recognized and eliminated. More attentive to the status of the partner.

Anxiety: Low Income
Solution: Map the sources of your income, direct and indirect. Think over the sources of additional income. Think independently and talk with management how to make more money at this place (often works). Think of a job change.

In a similar way, create tasks for all your worries, and then simply enter them into your system for completing the assigned tasks. It can be a notebook with a list of cases, or an electronic system - it does not matter. Just start doing at least one task every day, and very soon you will start eliminating your anxieties as you cross out completed tasks.

Believe me, getting rid of your anxieties, or rather, achieving your own Peace of Mind brings fantastic pleasure and fills the world with bright colors and positive emotions.

View graphic example in large format.

Why does this work?

In short, our brain is not able to simultaneously handle as many tasks as are contained in our Tranquility map. All this is exacerbated by the complexity of focusing on individual tasks. Thoughts begin to gallop, which ultimately leads to increased stress.

After we visualized our anxieties and outlined specific actions to achieve Tranquility, it becomes obvious that not everything is as scary as we thought.

This situation can be compared with sensations in the dark. So far we have not visualized the anxieties and have not painted the tasks for their deliverance - we are in a dark unfamiliar room, where we are very anxious and scary. If we move in such a situation, then the movements are very cautious and constrained (nothing is terrible and unclear).

After our concerns have acquired a completely distinct look, and next to them there are already specific tasks that will save us from them - we “find the switch”, turn on the light in our room and suddenly it turns out that this place is well known and familiar to us. We come to life and begin to move intensively, calmly and confidently.

That's the whole simple technique. It really works effectively. Moreover, some people lack the simple visualization of their anxieties, without accepting and completing tasks to eliminate them. But we have an active life position, and we feel the need to perform the assigned tasks - right? :) In this case, we can get double the pleasure - to save your life from stress and serious anxiety, and enjoy the tasks performed.

Version of the methodology for fans of the most effective time spent

1. Choose a tool to create a map
2. Ensure confidentiality and security of the document.
3. Create a skeleton of anxiety in the form of large thematic groups (see example)
4. Fill each group with anxieties (see example)
5. Schedule tasks leading to deliverance from every disturbance (see example)
6. Plan their implementation
7. Perform at least one scheduled action per day.
8. Mark tasks in the map and cross out to get rid of anxieties in bold.

Sample map in MindManager 8 format.