My story about Sberbank Online

And so, let's say you have accumulated a small amount of money and you want to open a card and deposit at Sberbank (because it is in your house and you haven’t dealt with it before) (as it is easier to do, read ohsh.habrahabr better here . com / blog / 86794 )
We went to the nearest branch, stood for half an hour in the queue, opened a deposit, ordered a card, waited 5 (!) Weeks , got a card.

But do not walk the same every time and push yourself with grandmothers to stand in lines? We go to the office, we say that we want to connect this very Online. The girl in the window says "Our base is not ready yet, they promise it from February!" # ^ *:% No?:%! We call 8 800 555 5550, we ask - “Is that so?”, They say to go to the ATM and get the ID and passwords.

We approach the ATM, print out the ID and password, come home, go to the site, everything is ok! But how to transfer money from a card to a deposit? We call 8 800 555 5550, the operator says something like "You need to go to the office and write a statement." @ * ($% ^ # ^. We are heading to the branch, all to the same girl who says again - “It’s impossible, the base is not ready!”. Silently swear, go to another branch, the other girl gives out the identifier, the first authorization comes the password by sms. # * @ $ ^ @ # $, who made this horror ?! Indeed, everything is damp and not ready, we score for an indefinite period, it can work.
')
It seems everything, now we are the owners of 2 online, we don’t need to go anywhere else, it remains only to wait.

Output. Morning. Go check the money on the card.


What the x ****? We recruit friends 8 800 555 5550, "Hello, why am I female?", Enjoy the music, "You need to go to the office where you received the card and confirm your details." We hang up, silently cursing.

Sorry if it was hard to read, I'm sick ...