March 10, 1940 was born Carlos Ray Norris
A little off topic, but judging by the comments on some articles on Habré, there are a lot of admirers of this person even in our sandbox. Under the cut a bit from the book "400 facts about the greatest man of all time, Chuck Norris."
If you have $ 5 and Chuck Norris has $ 5, then Chuck Norris has more money than you.
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Chuck Norris can kill two hunters with one hare.
The most common causes of death in the United States are: 1) cardiovascular diseases, 2) Chuck Norris, 3) cancerous tumors.
Most people have 23 pairs of chromosomes. Chuck Norris has 72 ... and they are all poisonous.
Chuck Norris can win in tic-tac-toe in one move.
The police code for attackers on Chuck Norris is 45-11: suicide.
Chuck Norris does not wash clothes - he shakes out of her dirt.
The Bible says that Jesus turned water into wine. The Bible is silent, then Chuck Norris turned this wine into beer.
Chuck Norris can hit you so much that it changes your DNA. After dozens of years, your descendants will suddenly clutch their heads and exclaim: “what the hell was that?”
In fact, Chuck Norris did not write his books, just the words of fear were themselves put together into ready-made sentences.
Better to see once than to hear 100 times. It is better to see Chuck Norris once than to hear about him 1,000,000,000 times.
Newton's third law is erroneous: it says that for every action there is opposition, but nothing in the world can constitute opposition to Chuck Norris' circular blow.
When Chuck Norris speaks, everyone silently listens. And then they die.
Chuck Norris invented black. In fact, he invented all colors except pink. Pink color was invented by Tom Cruise.
For each birthday, Chuck Norris chooses the first child he finds and kicks him to the Sun with a kick.
Chuck Norris grinds coffee with his finger, and then boils water with his anger.
Archaeologists have discovered an old English explanatory dictionary, written in 1236. In it, the word "victim" is explained as "a man who got in the way of Chuck Norris."
The Bermuda Triangle was a square, until Chuck Norris broke one corner with his round kick.
Thousands of years ago, a bear saw Chuck Norris. The bear was so frightened that he ran to live north to the Arctic. Moreover, he was so frightened that his wool and the fur of all his descendants became white.
Chuck Norris played Russian roulette with a fully loaded revolver, and won.
Chuck Norris is responsible for overpopulating China. One day, he flew to China to participate in the karate championship, and at the same time all the women within a 1000-mile radius became pregnant.
Some people wear Superman pajamas for the night. Supermen wear pajamas with a picture of Chuck Norris for the night.
Chuck Norris once worked in the weather department on the evening news in San Diego. His predictions were always the same: partial cloudiness with a 75% probability of Suffering.
Taking the diamond from both sides and stretching, Chuck Norris is able to turn it back into coal.
In fact, Chuck Norris does not kill people with his round kick. In fact, these people are never existed in our space-time continuum.
It is expected that Chuck Norris will win all the swimming competitions at the 2008 Olympics, despite the fact that he does not know how to swim. When he enters the pool, the water makes way for him in horror, and he can calmly walk along the bottom.
In the first version of The Lord of the Rings, instead of Frodo Baggins was Chuck Norris. The text consisted of only five pages, as Chuck Norris kicked Sauron’s ass with his round kick in the middle of the first chapter.
Chuck Norris proved that we are alone in the universe. This became a fact after his first space mission.
Superman once watched one episode of The Steep Walker. After that, he hardly fell asleep and several times woke up all in tears.
There is no global warming. Just once, Chuck Norris felt cold, and he warmed up the sun.
Legend does not lie - Chuck Norris really built Rome in one day.
Everyone who is elected president of the United States should ask Chuck Norris for permission to live in the White House. The reason for this is that Chuck Norris has won all elections - presidential, gubernatorial, and municipal - since 1777. He simply allows others to rule the country instead.
Chuck Norris is the only person in the world who can kick someone with an e-mail with a circular kick.
Chuck Norris can burn an ant with a magnifying glass. At night.
Some children play football beer cans. Chuck Norris plays football beer kegs.
“Scorching cold” is a poor word for Chuck Norris. After each workout, he cools his muscles with hot lava.
Chuck Norris does not know how to love, he just sometimes can NOT kill.
When Chuck Norris was a child, his mother did not breastfeed him, she just watered his whiskey, straight from the bottle.
One day, Chuck Norris pulled a hair out of his beard and pierced three people at the same time.
As an act of charity, Chuck Norris once made a big donation to the American Cancer Center. He donated 6,000 dead bodies for scientific research.
Chuck Norris invented a language entirely consisting of circular kicks and other karate techniques. So the next time he kicks your ass, you can not be offended - maybe he just wants to say that he likes your hat.
Chuck Norris can cause not only fear, but also hope - that he will not hit you.
Behind every successful man is a woman. Behind every dead man stands Chuck Norris.
Most shoes are made to walk in. Chuck Norris boots are not so harmless.
The United States boycotted the Olympiad in Moscow in 1980 for non-political reasons. It’s just that Chuck Norris killed the entire Olympic team of the country with one round kick during a taekwondo training session.
Chuck Norris uses a live rattlesnake as a condom.
The Bible was originally called "The Adventures of Chuck Norris and His Friends."
Google does not find Chuck Norris, because he knows: if you find Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris will find you.
Chuck Norris can lead a horse to a watering place and make him drink.
It is scientifically impossible that Chuck Norris has a mortal father. The most common theory is that he went back in time and conceived himself.
Chuck Norris is not pushing off the ground - he shifts the Earth from the trajectory of a dangerous asteroid.
Nothing can withstand the gravitational attraction of a black hole, except for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris eats black holes. They taste like chicken.
Question: How many Chuck Norris do I need to screw in a light bulb? Answer: not at all, because Chuck Norris prefers to kill in the dark.
President Roosevelt said: “We have nothing to fear except fear itself. And Chuck Norris.
Since 1940, when Chuck Norris was born, the number of deaths from a circular kick has increased by 13,000%.
ChuckU NorrisU doesn’t need your own home. He simply comes into any house he likes, and the tenants run away.
Better to give than to take. This is especially true of Chuck Norris’s round kicks.
Chuck Norris does not eat. Food understands that you can only hide from his fists inside.
One day, Chuck Norris hit a horse in the face. The descendants of this horse are now called giraffes.
Human cloning is prohibited, because then there is a chance that Chuck Norris and his clone can simultaneously strike each other in a circular kick. Physicists believe that this will lead to the destruction of the universe.
Chuck Norris once jumped with a parachute, but decided not to repeat this again. One Grand Canyon is enough.
Ps. Wikipedia about Chuck
Pps. Chuck's official website
If you have $ 5 and Chuck Norris has $ 5, then Chuck Norris has more money than you.
')
Chuck Norris can kill two hunters with one hare.
The most common causes of death in the United States are: 1) cardiovascular diseases, 2) Chuck Norris, 3) cancerous tumors.
Most people have 23 pairs of chromosomes. Chuck Norris has 72 ... and they are all poisonous.
Chuck Norris can win in tic-tac-toe in one move.
The police code for attackers on Chuck Norris is 45-11: suicide.
Chuck Norris does not wash clothes - he shakes out of her dirt.
The Bible says that Jesus turned water into wine. The Bible is silent, then Chuck Norris turned this wine into beer.
Chuck Norris can hit you so much that it changes your DNA. After dozens of years, your descendants will suddenly clutch their heads and exclaim: “what the hell was that?”
In fact, Chuck Norris did not write his books, just the words of fear were themselves put together into ready-made sentences.
Better to see once than to hear 100 times. It is better to see Chuck Norris once than to hear about him 1,000,000,000 times.
Newton's third law is erroneous: it says that for every action there is opposition, but nothing in the world can constitute opposition to Chuck Norris' circular blow.
When Chuck Norris speaks, everyone silently listens. And then they die.
Chuck Norris invented black. In fact, he invented all colors except pink. Pink color was invented by Tom Cruise.
For each birthday, Chuck Norris chooses the first child he finds and kicks him to the Sun with a kick.
Chuck Norris grinds coffee with his finger, and then boils water with his anger.
Archaeologists have discovered an old English explanatory dictionary, written in 1236. In it, the word "victim" is explained as "a man who got in the way of Chuck Norris."
The Bermuda Triangle was a square, until Chuck Norris broke one corner with his round kick.
Thousands of years ago, a bear saw Chuck Norris. The bear was so frightened that he ran to live north to the Arctic. Moreover, he was so frightened that his wool and the fur of all his descendants became white.
Chuck Norris played Russian roulette with a fully loaded revolver, and won.
Chuck Norris is responsible for overpopulating China. One day, he flew to China to participate in the karate championship, and at the same time all the women within a 1000-mile radius became pregnant.
Some people wear Superman pajamas for the night. Supermen wear pajamas with a picture of Chuck Norris for the night.
Chuck Norris once worked in the weather department on the evening news in San Diego. His predictions were always the same: partial cloudiness with a 75% probability of Suffering.
Taking the diamond from both sides and stretching, Chuck Norris is able to turn it back into coal.
In fact, Chuck Norris does not kill people with his round kick. In fact, these people are never existed in our space-time continuum.
It is expected that Chuck Norris will win all the swimming competitions at the 2008 Olympics, despite the fact that he does not know how to swim. When he enters the pool, the water makes way for him in horror, and he can calmly walk along the bottom.
In the first version of The Lord of the Rings, instead of Frodo Baggins was Chuck Norris. The text consisted of only five pages, as Chuck Norris kicked Sauron’s ass with his round kick in the middle of the first chapter.
Chuck Norris proved that we are alone in the universe. This became a fact after his first space mission.
Superman once watched one episode of The Steep Walker. After that, he hardly fell asleep and several times woke up all in tears.
There is no global warming. Just once, Chuck Norris felt cold, and he warmed up the sun.
Legend does not lie - Chuck Norris really built Rome in one day.
Everyone who is elected president of the United States should ask Chuck Norris for permission to live in the White House. The reason for this is that Chuck Norris has won all elections - presidential, gubernatorial, and municipal - since 1777. He simply allows others to rule the country instead.
Chuck Norris is the only person in the world who can kick someone with an e-mail with a circular kick.
Chuck Norris can burn an ant with a magnifying glass. At night.
Some children play football beer cans. Chuck Norris plays football beer kegs.
“Scorching cold” is a poor word for Chuck Norris. After each workout, he cools his muscles with hot lava.
Chuck Norris does not know how to love, he just sometimes can NOT kill.
When Chuck Norris was a child, his mother did not breastfeed him, she just watered his whiskey, straight from the bottle.
One day, Chuck Norris pulled a hair out of his beard and pierced three people at the same time.
As an act of charity, Chuck Norris once made a big donation to the American Cancer Center. He donated 6,000 dead bodies for scientific research.
Chuck Norris invented a language entirely consisting of circular kicks and other karate techniques. So the next time he kicks your ass, you can not be offended - maybe he just wants to say that he likes your hat.
Chuck Norris can cause not only fear, but also hope - that he will not hit you.
Behind every successful man is a woman. Behind every dead man stands Chuck Norris.
Most shoes are made to walk in. Chuck Norris boots are not so harmless.
The United States boycotted the Olympiad in Moscow in 1980 for non-political reasons. It’s just that Chuck Norris killed the entire Olympic team of the country with one round kick during a taekwondo training session.
Chuck Norris uses a live rattlesnake as a condom.
The Bible was originally called "The Adventures of Chuck Norris and His Friends."
Google does not find Chuck Norris, because he knows: if you find Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris will find you.
Chuck Norris can lead a horse to a watering place and make him drink.
It is scientifically impossible that Chuck Norris has a mortal father. The most common theory is that he went back in time and conceived himself.
Chuck Norris is not pushing off the ground - he shifts the Earth from the trajectory of a dangerous asteroid.
Nothing can withstand the gravitational attraction of a black hole, except for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris eats black holes. They taste like chicken.
Question: How many Chuck Norris do I need to screw in a light bulb? Answer: not at all, because Chuck Norris prefers to kill in the dark.
President Roosevelt said: “We have nothing to fear except fear itself. And Chuck Norris.
Since 1940, when Chuck Norris was born, the number of deaths from a circular kick has increased by 13,000%.
ChuckU NorrisU doesn’t need your own home. He simply comes into any house he likes, and the tenants run away.
Better to give than to take. This is especially true of Chuck Norris’s round kicks.
Chuck Norris does not eat. Food understands that you can only hide from his fists inside.
One day, Chuck Norris hit a horse in the face. The descendants of this horse are now called giraffes.
Human cloning is prohibited, because then there is a chance that Chuck Norris and his clone can simultaneously strike each other in a circular kick. Physicists believe that this will lead to the destruction of the universe.
Chuck Norris once jumped with a parachute, but decided not to repeat this again. One Grand Canyon is enough.
Ps. Wikipedia about Chuck
Pps. Chuck's official website
Source: https://habr.com/ru/post/86982/
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