About finding yourself

Foreword

Probably, like many, I did not immediately find a use in this world. And in my case, the search for myself took a lot of time, and the people around me made a great contribution to this, for which they were infinite thanks.

I think I now have the feeling that I found what I was looking for.

Along with this, in my social circle there are people for whom this issue is still relevant. And, since I used to be fond of writing articles, I decided that my story and conclusions could be useful to someone.
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Immediately, of course, I want to make a reservation that everything described below is not a full story, but also not a universal guide. These are generalizations from the path that I took from a military university to psychology, marketing, and eventually came to the IT sphere.

Point 1. Where to start?

The first thing to think about is “What can I produce (create / generate / often, a lot and relatively easy to do)?” .

Or a little differently it may sound like this: “What the hell other people (or myself) most often notice in me, or what people contact me often?”

This is the most fundamental point, which ultimately leads, firstly, to awareness and, secondly, determines the vector of application of efforts. And ultimately it divides the world into those who do what they love, do it well and for good money; and those who “suffer, but lag”, those who go to unloved work, do it poorly and, naturally, receive little.

/ * There may be several paragraphs (or articles) about the reasons behind beliefs about themselves, about their capabilities, about the world and about permissions. But omit or deploy another time. * /

Generally speaking, this is the core on which the “vocation” is built, and this is something that in one way or another will manifest itself in a person, either constructively or destructively. It will either be a source of additional “energy” everywhere, or it will try to express itself and break down what it is, because it does not get any other way out. That is, it can manifest itself as an “energy” that drives us towards what we want, otherwise it will push us out of what we don’t want.

So. Starting point: What can I produce a lot and easily?

From here two ways:

1.1 - I know what
1.2 - I do not know what

First, point 1.2. "I do not know what I can produce"

If it is not known what, or it seems that I can not produce anything. I must say, I’m almost sure that every person by the age of 20, plus or minus, has some kind of pronounced trait, and maybe not one. This refers to some kind of activity that is associated with a kind of state of involvement, immersion and concentration of attention. John Grinder and Judith Delozier in the book “Turtles to the very bottom” call this a “demonic state,” well, or it may not yet be fully formed, but it can be seen from the side.

If, nevertheless, there is no such feature or not. That is most likely the problem :
“Lack of activity and experience of interacting with different people / objects / situations in different contexts”.

Solution : (Oddly enough) To fill this gap. Start trying different activities, explore new areas, get new information. Especially noteworthy is that the least known or close. It is worth trying to look at it with the most unbiased and open look. And so try until the regular feature does not appear.

Note : This does not mean “quitting everything and looking for inspiration.” This is about taking all your free time, shaking all r out of it ** but - instagrams, VK, stupid TV shows, chatting with stupid people, spitting at the ceiling, games in the console, and another thousand time-killers.

Invest time in solving the actual problem. Then you will have dividends in the form of the pleasure of life.

Clause 1.1. "I know that I can produce"

Here again a fork.

1.1.A - What I can - is in demand
1.1.B - That I can - not claimed (Alas, the world is ruthless)

Clause 1.1.A. "I know that I can produce and it is claimed"

In fact, there is also a fork, but I will say easier. Quite infrequently it happens that you have a pronounced feature and it is purely in demand. But it happens.
For example, there is a bright feature to make a beautiful manicure, somehow masterly and with great pleasure. Demanded in its purest form.

OK. Moving on to the next item 2 - “Grow a beginner.”
See further.

More often it happens that a pronounced trait is indirectly related to a particular activity.
For example, what do you think is common between repairing electric motors, psychological counseling and programming?

There is no correct answer, but for myself I found that when I was engaged in each of these activities, I basically used the same trait. Ability to abstract from direct content, to see the structure / patterns and reorganize it / them so that the result produced by the structure is better according to more criteria.

Of course, this feature has a different wrapper in different areas. And returning to the topic, the same trait, wrapped in different ways, may refer in one case to clause 1.1.A (claimed) and clause 1.1.B. (not claimed) .

Note : When you formulate your expressed trait for yourself, do not worry) It sometimes sounds strange and it is not clear where it is and why. This is normal. Let me remind you that in many respects it is a wrapper. But it is very important that you are “under wrapping” - what you love and what brings you pleasure or “a bunch of negative emotions and beliefs”.

So here. If you are at that point, when you have felt in yourself that which lights you up and gives you “energy”, then you are already on the right path. Probably, the only wish is: “Ni Si. Turn on the fantasy ... show yourself even more ... perceive what is happening as a game ... close your eyes more often and imagine that more of this can be, imagine that there are no obstacles ... move more confidently and braverly ... ".

Plus, it will never be superfluous to mix something with something.

Many successful projects / products were formed at the junction of two or more spheres, or when placing something from one context to another. Unmanned taxis, 3D-printers, self-service stores, car sharing, timecafé, calligraphutura Pokrasa Lampasa, installers, electric scooters, artificial wave surfing, robotic surgery ... Damn, so much ... And all this is not done by someone from other planets, but such same people as you and me.
Start small, strive for the great!

Books that may be interesting for the philosophy: R. Dilts and S. Gilligen - “Hero's Journey”; V. Demchog - “Mythology of many faces”; R. Gandapas - "Complete F".

Plus, it probably will not hurt to read something about marketing and tools for business. But here is someone like ... Although you still need to promote yourself or your services, whatever they may be. So feel free to read Igor Mann and listen to Business Youth in your free time.

And go to step 2 - “Grow a newbie . ”

Item 1.1.B. "I know that I can, but it is not claimed"

This is a more frequent situation. But not because there is so much unclaimed, more often the question relates to personal convictions. For example, I have a friend, he is engaged in programming, which does not like, and let's be honest, he is not very good at it. But he also draws well for his own pleasure. And he is convinced that, I quote, “yes, who needs it,” he is talking about his drawings.

The person is obviously convinced that artistic skills (not currently wrapped in any kind of packaging) are commercially unpromising. From this it follows that he will not take steps to develop the skill, since he does not believe in it. Even though it gives him pleasure, unlike what he is doing now. This leads to the following negative belief: “that which brings money is not a pleasure”. It should be the other way around.

Possible problems of this point and possible solutions, respectively:

• "There is no claimed wrapper"

Not an easy question, but in general, “whoever seeks will find”
But seriously, this can be solved either through thought experiments (for introverts) - to imagine how you are doing this or that work in details, or how this or that person is doing this work. Or, through communication, ask everyone around about their activities in detail and try on themselves. Ideally, do both. And also be attentive to your intuition and listen to what responds.

As for the understanding of the “philosophy of the wrapper,” it was a bit late for me to get a book in which there are many useful things for this state of affairs. David Newman “Take it and do it! 77 of the most useful marketing tools. Aligns the picture of the world.
More at this stage and in this article I will not say.

• “There is not enough level”

Easy to guess. Level up. Courses, communication with professionals, and most importantly - set yourself challenging tasks and by all means solve them.

• "An overabundance of negative beliefs, which greatly distort the picture of the world and lead to a state of" hedgehog in the fog under LSD "

There is not one solution here, but I can say that it will definitely benefit. Firstly, of course, communication with a competent (!) Psychologist. Finding a competent psychologist is not very easy, but I believe that this is possible and that you will be lucky.

Secondly, it is reading useful (!) Books. I give a list of those that I read and which I consider very useful in this context.

Richard Bender - "Conversations" (not all, but there are interesting chapters); R. Bender, J. Grinder - “The Structure of Magic”; Ken Wilber - "Theory of Everything", "A Brief History of Everything"; Timur Gagin - "Plasticine of the world"; Peter McNab - Integral Communication.

• "The lack of soft skills that prevents you from filing yourself as a specialist and prevents you from building adequate communication"

In general, being a professional is necessary and commendable, but more often than not it is not enough. We all live in a world where there are a lot of people and we need to communicate with them, despite the fact that everyone is very different. All the power of NLP, coaching and business training to help you, plus the same books as in the previous paragraph, plus R. Dilts “Language Tricks”, and for hardcore players there is Michael Hall “Communication Magic” and “51 Metaprograms”.

Item 2. “Grow a newbie”

As you know, "Practice makes perfect".

When you know that it is naturally generated from you, and it is claimed, a situation may arise that there are a lot of people like you. The notorious competition. This is an important point, which, on the surface, gives rise to one inadequate assumption: “such as I am complete, who needs me”. This is only partly true. This state of affairs relates only to the initial level of possession of one or another skill. In other words, the most competition is due to the large number of beginners and (sad story) those who have long been engaged in "not their business." In other words, this is not fully competition, since 50% of competitors are those who are just starting and those who have long been squeezed out of themselves that they are not doing very well and have low quality of results, as well as a low level of interest. and motivation, and as a result of the low level of financial results, and as a result, again motivation.

In fact, half of them need to go to point 1 and start over. Because they will not be able to pass point 2 precisely because they do not have the most basic - a huge source of interest and involvement, which is a consequence of the fact that you are engaged in what (conditionally) emanates from you. In other words, the answer to the question: “What I can produce a lot and easily” is what you have a basic interest and affection for. It may well be called a “destination”, “mission” or “vocation”. Clarifying that moment that “vocation” is in fact not a specific activity, but the feature that makes one or another activity work well (relatively) easily and with pleasure.

For the sake of history, I must say that I consciously applied this feature to me first in psychology, then in sales, then in SEO, and only now in development. And I returned three times as a matter of fact to clause 1.1.B. to the problem of an inappropriate wrapper. And I must say in each of these activities, my skill gave its good results, but they were different financially and different in terms of pleasure.

So here. Throwing away the conviction of competition, do you need to check whether there are still convictions that prevent you from improving easily and with pleasure?

And in general it is worth taking as a habit to carry out such a “Check back”:
"At what point am I at?"
“Do I go where I want?”
“What is stopping me from moving?”
“What do I need to move on?”
“What do I need to do to get what I need to move on?”


It can also interfere with fear / ignorance of what to do next Can hinder the uncertainty in their own abilities. A lot of things can be. But the essence does not change. You need to raise your level.
If they themselves do not really understand what needs to be improved, then it is quite possible to find colleagues who gain more and compare knowledge. Or go through the Eychara with the question: "I want to earn so much that I need for this."

Well, then the actual cultivation itself and honing skills. The more competent you are, the more you can, the more your influence, the more you are needed, the more you profit, the more you can, the more your influence ... well, you understand.

In addition, there is another point.

Clause 2.1. Common features of a “non-novice”

The bottom line is that different professional skills are required in different areas and I cannot say this. But there is something that in any promising area will be positive for a specialist who wants to increase his “rank”.

I can miss something, but plus or minus the list is as follows:

• Vision of the overall picture of the market / sphere / industry; the ability to compare and see the similarities and differences, and to know what results
• Awareness of their sphere of influence, their competencies; comparison with other specialists, knowledge of their strengths and weaknesses; knowledge for which tasks your competencies will be enough, and for which not, and what competences are not enough
• As a result, see the levels of specialists and levels of companies / businesses
• The ability and desire to take responsibility for what you do; knowledge of the limits of their responsibility; desire to take more responsibility
• Understanding how exactly your skills influence the activities of a company / industry / industry and how exactly your actions affect your profit
• The ability to see the problems; the ability to understand / understand what is their reason; the ability to find a solution, even if there is no finished one, and people around do not know
• The ability to separate the most important from the minor, the important from the unimportant, the useful from the useless
• It is reasonable to choose when to act tactically, and when strategically (and know what the difference is)
• The ability to explain the details of their work and the general ability to explain; and later to train
• Expand your outlook in the industry and expand the number of indirect professional skills

About the latter, for example, I'm a fender. At the junior level, people expect me to know HTML, CSS, JS, I can make up quality, adaptive and cross-browser. I know the main framework. Git, then ...

As an extension of skills, it is quite good to learn server languages ​​- NodeJS, PHP, Python, knowledge of database device and poke, for example, MySQL / MongoDB, ability to work from the console, Bash, network device, writing bots / parsers ... and much more.

I'm trying to draw attention to the fact that, in principle, knowing the main thing, I can call myself a front-end developer. And this is not contested. But only the base does not single out me and, most importantly, does not deepen my knowledge, does not expand my vision and intuition.

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You can write further about scaling, automation, leadership opinions, mentoring and cloning leaders, but I think that as soon as you get to “second base” (as ambiguous jokes in American comedies), everything goes further “like clockwork”.

Based on the humor of Vladimir Marconi, “All right, now those who have read this article, you will definitely become steeper than the rest who read this article. You can transfer money to my e-wallet ... ". In general, I hope these ideas will be useful to somebody.