Jokes about the recent astronauts in outer space

A couple of days ago, astronauts carried out the opening of thermal insulation and micrometeorite protection of the Soyuz MS-09 spacecraft, in order to get from the outside to the small hull hole detected on September 30, examine it and take samples. The frames received during the live broadcast impressed the majority of the audience, including foreign journalists, with whose jokes I suggest you to get acquainted.

Journalist “The Verge” Lorena Pear:

The real voice message I left: I apologize for not calling you back yesterday. I was distracted by the Russians, ripping up their spaceship.

(Tweet Harrison , the web editor of the Planetary Society, retweets this message)
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Journalist Matthew Bodner

1) This is probably another first achievement of the Russian space program: the astronaut just bared a large knife and pierced his spaceship with it.

(a retweet of this message was made by the main author of the Space News publication, Jeff Faust )

2) After all this work, the first thing that astronauts report is that they did not find anything that could help in determining the origin of the hole. Maybe they just drilled her enough?

Freelance writer for The New York Times, Popular Science, and Shannon Stone:

1) Today we received the first “selfie” from a spacecraft on Mars, and a spacewalk consisting of an astronaut piercing the Soyuz again and again. In general, I would say that it was a pretty good day for astronautics.

Of course, now I refuse to watch spacewalks in which the astronauts will not prick anything. This is dangerous - yes. But so cool to look at it.

2) This spacewalk is in two words:

[Shots of Jack Nicholson hitting the door with an ax from the movie "The Shining" ]

All space twitter tracking spacewalks:

[Footage of Shelley Duval from the same film, standing at that moment outside the door]

Chris Bergin, NASASpaceFlight chief editor:

1) Ready for cutting Union.
Anesthesia ship is not planned ... but in space, no one will hear your screams.
Thank! I'm here all day! * Crowd disappointed *

2) Today was an interesting day.
This, when the captions at the end did not include the phrase "and not a single spaceship was harmed during the filming of this film."
The poor Union MS-09.

Eric Berger, Senior Editor, Ars Technica:

1) Just a Russian cosmonaut with a pair of space scissors, about to make a cut in the ship. Nothing special.

Please do not cut your spaceship at home.

2) Assumption: this process could go faster if they used one of them. Maybe check their availability on the ship Dragon, which just came.

3) The guys are just trying to unravel everything. Please try to make sure that the cutter does not touch anything. This extra-shipping activity is something.

4) If they do not cut their rocket with scissors in flight, then I am not interested, to be honest.

[link to the new flight of the SpaceShipTwo ship from Virgin Galactic]