Not a dumpling programmer alive or a story about how to manage everything

At the request of the workers and in connection with the transfer - I return the post, which pleased many. I hope the UFO will not mind.

I was inspired to write this post by a wonderful post “For what exactly I hate some individual marketers - or as an IT specialist I went shopping . ” I just want to apologize for any typos - I am writing from a tablet, sitting in a minibus and pulling out the network with a phone. Hacker's keyboard is very convenient for ssh access, but it’s not very convenient to write large texts.
')
IT specialists are curious people. They will assemble an automatic irrigation and lighting system for their favorite ficus based on microcontrollers, then they will patch the multicooker firmware to distribute torrents. But, for an incomprehensible and mysterious reason, when it comes to food, the notorious principle of DIY fails. And our hero, who is able to remake the kinescope of the old TV for Death Beam for hours, goes to the kitchen to satisfy his hunger with soybean textures in half with hydrocellulose and “collagen raw materials.”

In this post I want to destroy the myth that food can be either quick and convenient, or edible. It is no secret that many of us have to work 12 hours a day, which does not contribute to culinary feats involving 28 seasonings and feathers from the dragon's backside, washed with tears of a unicorn. You will get a wonderful opportunity to look into your half’s eyes on March 8 after she receives not handmade controller for remote control of the curtain, but freshly baked handmade bread in the early morning. If you are tired of eating synthetics - welcome under the hubracut.

Tasty and healthy food is not difficult

The deep conviction of many people that it is impossible to cook tasty and healthy food in a short time - a delusion. The main problem here lies in the poor timing. The cooking process can be compared to managing a large project, which consists of many parallel processes. Many of these processes are interrelated and dependent on each other. Accordingly, the main mistake is the “compilation” of food into “one stream”. With proper planning, you can cook just great dinners in minutes. Cooking on a tight schedule is a good test for project managers.

It is necessary to distinguish the division into active and passive processes. For example, continuous stirring of a tricky sauce for 40 minutes will take more active time than throwing chopped vegetables and meat pieces into the oven for 1.5 hours. The second process will require about 5 minutes for active interaction - cutting. The rest happens without your participation, and you can spend time scratching the cat / writing code / reading the habr.

At this stage, I would like to send everyone interested in the programs of the wonderful British chef - Jamie Oliver and his cycle "Jamie Oliver: Lunch in 30 minutes."
As a result, you can cook something like this for half an hour of active time :

Normal dough burgers and fresh minced beef. Nothing to do with creepy plastic fast food

Crunchy baguette or ruin supermarkets

Since the post is in DIY, we will equate the use of bread machines to cheating and try to understand what the beauty of the “manual assembly” is. What is the main problem of bread from the store?
Firstly, it is difficult to buy quite fresh. French baguette "lives" no more than 4 hours. Then he loses all his charm.
Secondly, bakeries save on raw materials. Instead of a direct increase in the cost of the product, they first reduce the weight of the loaf to a couple of hundred grams, turning it into foam, and then switch to frankly damaged raw materials. You did not notice that from the moment you bought the bread, the race between you and the mold begins? The fact is that most penicillin fungi and a number of others calmly tolerate baking in the form of spores. The reverse side of the medal is bread that does not get stale and does not deteriorate for almost months. You can imagine what they add there. At this time, homemade bread contains water, salt, flour and yeast in a minimal configuration. Everything.

Why do I suggest trying to do it yourself? I want to dispel the idea that bread is a complex product that is prepared at secret government factories only by specially trained people. It is especially wild when in the villages the grandmothers line up for the frozen brick, having traditional Russian stoves at home.

Let the magic begin!

We will need some amount of ingredients and utensils. I strongly advise you to use as a measure of the products mass, but not volume. More precisely.

Ingredients:
Water 300 grams (300 ml.)
Flour 500 gr. or 3 glasses
Salt 10 gr. (2 tsp.)
Sugar 0-30 gr.
Yeast 5 gr. (2 tsp.)

Dishes and stuff:
Convenient large capacity for the test. Well fit steel hemispheres from Ikea.
Baking tray or rack for the oven.
Glass cloth sheet for baking (sold under the brand Eat at home) or silicone.
Scales or measuring tanks

Begin to build the project. Mixing ingredients

The easiest way is to first measure the water, pouring it into a container, then dissolve everything in it except flour. This is especially felt when you have coarse salt. The undissolved crystals will crunch in the finished product. However, this is not a dogma - perhaps you want to make it a highlight of your dish.

All ingredients have taken their place in the batch tank.

Now the main task is to simply mix all the ingredients in a dense, elastic dough with a homogeneous consistency. By the way, a side plus from regular bread baking is the prevention of tunnel syndrome and strengthening the muscles of the forearms. Agree that for many it is an occupational disease. The dough is a great expander. The result should be something like the photo below:


Kneaded dough


Finally formed ball of dough

The correct dough should be slightly sticky, but should be separated from the fingers without any problems.

Take a pause

Gentoo Linux adepts should be familiar with a meditative state in anticipation of the end of rebuilding the world. Here is about the same situation. The stage of maturation of the test does not require intervention, and therefore active time. During this process, the yeast produces not only carbon dioxide, but also many aromatic substances that cause the taste of the finished bread. The longer the process, the more pronounced the taste. But keep in mind that the process takes at least 2 hours. Here we have 2 ways - fast and slow option.

Fast
The dough matures in a warm place. Time 2-3 hours. Bread turns out more light, with easy air texture. The taste is light, wheat.

Slow
Mature dough. Basic option for French baguettes. Time 8-12 hours. Ripens in the refrigerator. The taste is rich, ripe, with a slight bitterness. The crust is darker. On a cut larger bubbles.

An important nuance! The dough should always be covered with something, so as not to lose water. Otherwise, you will get a dry crust on the surface, which will spoil the result.

Create your little masterpiece

So, you have successfully completed your previous stage. The dough has increased in volume several times and looks like this:


Immediately determine the surface on which you will bake. The best option is a sheet of fiberglass brownish. Sold under the brand "Eat at Home". The most ideal surface that I met. Boiling caramel swept with a cloth after cooling without problems.


Now you need to decide what you sculpt from your test. I prefer the simple version - two elongated baguettes. Here you need to make a retreat and tell you what happened to your child in these few hours. Flour contains protein - gluten, which swells and changes the texture of the dough. If at first it could be easily divided into several pieces, then with maturation it becomes elastic, tends to regain its shape. This is where the tricks of work with the future loaf follow - you can simply roll it into a sausage, but it may not keep its shape. It would be more correct to fold it in half 4-5 times along one axis. We thus bring internal tension and, as it were, cocked the spring. As a result, the baguette itself will keep its shape even with a rather thin dough.

So, you fashioned two baguettes and got something like this:




Turn the oven on 225 degrees. While it is warming up, cover your baguettes with a second sheet.


Wait 20-30 minutes. During this time, the dough will fit again and baguettes will increase.


Now, before the final jerk, we have to cut them. The cuts are needed in order to reduce the internal stress of the expanding dough. Otherwise, it will break in arbitrary places. By the way, in France the direction and shape of the cuts is the individual signature of the author and the bakery. This is the authentication method.) We will make simple longitudinal cuts. Although you can try any options you like.

Final stage

In the oven, the bread will stay for a short time 25-27 minutes at a temperature of 225 degrees. Here you need to understand an important relationship:
If you bake at a lower temperature - the time in the oven increases, but the bread loses more water. You can get a rough and thick crust. If the oven is at a higher temperature, time is shortened, but you can get a wet middle if the piece is thick. Therefore, pizza, for example, is baked at a high temperature so as not to dry - about 250 degrees.

We take out our beauty and manifest inhuman willpower to let the bread cool and evaporate excess water. It is best to use a grill.

Once again about the importance of time management

Calculate the cost of active time:
Sample and batch - 5 minutes
Sculpt baguettes and incise - 5 minutes
Get and put them out of the oven - 3 minutes.
Total - 13 minutes! Agree that the eternal argument "I have no time" does not work here. It is only important to calculate the time so that you can spend the next stage on time.

Fork a repository or make changes to a recipe

This recipe is the most basic and can change as you like. I will give only a few basic tips:
The ratio of dry mass and liquid should not vary greatly.
As a dry part, you can try: coarse-grained flour, flour from other grains, bran, seeds, sesame or even bacon.
As a liquid part: milk, vegetable oils of various kinds (15-20 ml), dairy products.

Instead of conclusion

Post rose from drafts. I would be glad if someone come in handy. Photos of your options are welcome.
Regarding the lost comments from the version: everything is preserved to the letter. I do not know just how best to insert it into the article. I can offer to read the main part of Sohabr