Say "Stop!" To the negative: become an anti-critic

Sad but true: the world is filled with critics who consider themselves entitled to humiliate others based on their ideas, actions and even personal convictions. It seems that the negative has already become commonplace, because it prevails among TV experts, in the columns of editors and in anonymous web comments. Politicians criticize their opponents instead of finding solutions during teamwork; bloggers and so-called experts condemn our methods of raising children, often giving conflicting advice; bosses are unhappy with your performance and ideas, and this list is endless. Instead of joining the majority and automatically condemning everyone whose ideas do not coincide with yours, become an anti-critic. How to do it?

It is not surprising that all this negative impact on us, even if we are driven by the best of intentions.
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It is important to take a step back and try to interrupt this cycle, because it is simply unproductive. Instead of joining the majority and automatically condemning everyone whose ideas do not coincide with yours, become an anti-critic. An anti-critic is one who collaborates, and does not constantly invent the reasons why others are wrong. He works with others to continually improve ideas and methods, rather than simply refuting them point by point.

The first step is to change your own perception of the word “critic”.

Understanding the difference between “criticism” and “verbal assault”

The word “criticism” usually has a negative connotation and equates to “attack”. For example, when a colleague criticizes your proposals related to the project, it is easier to go into deaf defense than to try to improve ideas for solving a problem, because it is easy to take criticism for a reproach.

But the truth is this: in reality, criticism is not a negative. “Criticize” (in the most general sense of the word) is simply “to look closely”. Therefore, an important step towards becoming anti-criticism is the change in the shade of the term “criticism” within its own mind.

When thinking about “criticism,” try to put this word on a par with “analysis” and “evaluation.” Revising your own definition will help you become more open to constructive criticism, and this is a serious step towards becoming an excellent partner. Next time, when someone from the team starts pointing out errors in your ideas or work, try to move the negative aside and find some useful advice at the heart of the criticism. If you manage to do so and respond by proposing constructive ideas, you will make a huge leap towards breaking the cycle of non-constructive criticism in your organization.

How to criticize

Continuing the conversation about the working situation described above, we will change our position and look at the criticism from the point of view of the opponent. If you are the one who gives a negative assessment to the ideas of a colleague, it's time to think about how you present your comments and whether they are constructive. To complete this step, you also need to reconsider your definition of criticism and go on to perceive yourself not as a critic, but as an appraiser.

To do this, always start with a positive. Take a look at the essence of the idea presented by the person , determine what will work out of it - and tell about it. Then move on to what could be improved. Here it is appropriate to mention the weak points and potential problems that you foresee, if you are ready to offer options for their elimination. Criticism without a solution is useless and only generates an eternal non-constructive negative and resentment. Always concentrate on improvements — creating ideas, not refuting them.

This does not mean that you should be biased during the evaluation of the idea. Your integrity for the sake of the project should be directed to cooperation, and not to condemnation.

From criticism to cooperation

An anti-critic is, in addition, also an assistant. He does not sit on the sidelines, throwing stones at him, but goes to the very center of the situation and finds out how to work together to find a solution that is superior to the existing one.

Criticism (evaluation or analysis) is important, but it must be constructive and lead to association and cooperation. A good approach that makes it effective is to ask for the right to express your opinion.

If you usually just automatically get into a conversation, voicing your judgment, try to get rid of this habit. True cooperation implies openness to the feelings and ideas of others. They may not want to listen to you or not need your assessment at the moment. Or it may seem to them that you take control of everything when you offer your opinion on the machine. The key to cooperation - the lack of "main". You are simply a multitude of people with knowledge and experience in various fields that you need to share in order, after discussion and analysis, to come up with a solution that fixes the problem and moves the project in the right direction.

There are so many critics in the world, and you should not contribute to this negative. Each member of the team can and should do so that the working atmosphere promotes constant movement forward, and not immersion in unproductive moments. Modeling in a team situations explaining what it means to be an anti-critic will lead to an increase in the level of cooperation and a decrease in the number of offenses and conflicts. Take time to seriously listen to others in the process of interaction, and be sure to accompany criticism with ideas on how to move forward.

PS We recommend another article on the topic - 5 simple steps to increase the effectiveness of communication .

Translated by Vyacheslav Davidenko, founder of MBA Consult .