Designers and pigeons

AS: I immediately wanted to put the neck “ not gay ”. Doves have a slippery metaphorical reputation. And it will be about this and not about it at the same time.

Pigeons and designers are victims (or darlings, here is how the map will lie down) of an invented image that has sat down so firmly in the public consciousness that it is sometimes difficult to pick out even undeniable personal experience. They have other common points that I want to talk about. Behind the first, from Picasso's naughty hands, the title of “the birds of the world ” was fixed. “ Ha-ha-ha ,” say zoologists, “ ha-ha-ha ,” say the Venetians, other large townspeople, and in general everyone who has eyes on their foreheads and brains behind them. But to believe in it is easy and simple; as simply as the fact that the designer is a young ( up to forty ) man, oddly dressed, metrosexual, with a French beard and a crazy look ( I did not invent this, but translated the "average European statistical conclusion").
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The first and second - absolutely antisocial . Fighting for food, fame (of local significance, with a small letter), a project, a pigeon, a place in a cube with a window, at the feeder, an increase ...

The place of the pigeon " forum " is easy to guess. By sound, smell, effects ... With design forums - the same song (how lucky they are in the virtual where space for excrement is unlimited).

Give the designer any thing (even if made by the right hand of Gd himself), and he will say in two accounts that this is a notorious “ shit ”, and if he doesn’t say, he will certainly find twenty (± 10) places that he can do. ” Better , more convenient and more interesting . Show pigeon a monument made by Rodin himself, and he ...

The designer believes that the name of his profession is stylish, sexy in and of itself and causes girls to be located (and the “ art director ” inscription on the business card is generally a deep orgasm-in-place ). The pigeon finds its melodic kurlik (it should be noted that luck is on its side, pigeons have no brains, they like it).

Pigeons do not care about who feeds them. Have you seen a grandfather-and-hundreds-pigeons-on-shoulders in the park, with an expression of good dementia on the wrinkled face? Get with a crust of bread nearby. In a minute all the pigeons will be at your feet, your hands ... well, where the crumbs will fall. I will not continue. Designers who have worked for more than three years in one firm - write in the comments.

Pigeon nests deserve special attention. As a rule, these are three branches, two branches and a clump of moss. If designers were among the pigeons, they would say for sure (dismissively twisting their mouths): “ this is such a clever minimalist idea, well, you won’t understand ... ” Design houses are different, but the reason to tell the guest something twisted mouth is sure there is.

“ Designers ordinary ”, as well as “ chord pigeons ”, is one of the lower, small and very ( oh-very !) Interchangeable links in the chain of happiness, wealth and great pleasures, big important Animals (power and kormpredderzhaschih). But there are distant lighthouses and landmarks (David Carson, Burney Dove, Neville Brody, Chip Kidd, Postal Dove Sanidei, Artemy Lebedev), which do not give rest to the maxik, the unfortunate little graphics from the printing shop “Superprint. Any printed orders for a hundred rubles. Also web sites. Entrance from the yard. They glitter with distant Porsche ™, giving faith in eternal glory, the opportunity to water anyone with shit with impunity and authority, and fatty champagne-brandy Happiness. the little maksik sobs, and instead of “ Dear Grandpa ...” he writes on the forum page: “ ... yes, you moron, have you ever seen a real tsmik? .. ”

PS: professional laziness did not allow me to put quotes wherever they needed meaning. Therefore, awesome designers (and literate pigeons of the world) will understand everything and will not be offended.

Original - in the designer's blog (hmm, by the way ...)