Jeff Dean from Google - Chuck Norris of our time

“Jeff Dean compiles and runs his code before the commit, but only to check the compiler and the CPU for bugs ,” is one of the many comic facts about Jeff Dean .

Jeff Dean is considered to be something like Chuck Norris. The only difference is that he is not a militant hero at all, but a Google software engineer.

Jokes about him first appeared on April 1, six years ago. One of Dean's colleagues, Kenton Ward, opened a page where everyone could add facts about Jeff Dean. The idea was enthusiastically picked up by other developers - and soon filled the page with many such “facts”.

“I have never coordinated this with anyone,” says Kenton Ward, “I just did it because I thought it would be fun and people would like it. So everything happens in Google. But my little joke can't even come close to the biggest and funniest projects on the corporate network. ”
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“When Jeff Dean develops a program, he first creates a binary, and then writes the source code as documentation.”

"Jeff Dean once failed the Turing test, because he correctly set the 203rd Fibonacci number in less than a second."

“Jeff Dean was born on December 31, 1969 at 23:48. It took him 12 minutes to start his first time counter. ”

Jeff Dean, even if he wants, can no longer get rid of the image of Chuck Norris. However, he is unlikely to care about such trifles. One of Google’s top programmers is considered the co-author of the company's key infrastructure systems, including MapReduce, BigTable and Spanner.

Dina was hired by Google in 1999, when about 20 employees worked there. Even then, he was considered one of the most talented young scientists in the US in the field of computer science (computer science), and for Google he was akin to winning the lottery. Every startup wants to get such a genius.

Back in school, Dean wrote a program for processing large volumes of epidemiological data, which, he said, was 26 times faster than any professional software in this field. Later, its development Epi Info began to be massively used in the disease control centers, the program is now translated into 13 languages.

In his student years, Jeff worked on compilers. He always liked to create programs that are aimed at maximum performance. Optimization is his fad.

“The speed of light in vacuum was about 55 km / h. Then Jeff Dean spent the weekend optimizing physics. ”

Having come to Google, Jeff worked a little on Google News and AdSense, and then drew attention to the main task that the company faced at that stage - scaling. Together with another outstanding programmer, Sanjay Ghemawat, and other colleagues, they set about creating software for processing large volumes of information in clusters. This is how MapReduce appeared, which very quickly became, in fact, an industry standard in its field.

Then there was the high-performance BigTable database based on the Google File System and the phenomenal Spanner system, a database that is globally distributed across a variety of Google data centers across continents — while ensuring the integrity and synchronization of the data. Before the creation of Spanner, almost no one believed that such a thing could be done at all. Actually, at this stage, the work biography of Jeff Dean begins to resemble fictional facts from an April Fool's collection, Slate writes . And it becomes clear why he became a candidate for the role of Chuck Norris.

“Jeff Dean doesn’t use Emacs or Vi. He dials the code directly in zcat, because it's faster. ”

“When Richard Stallman found out that Dean’s autobiography would be released exclusively on the Amazon platform, he bought a Kindle.”

“Dissatisfied with the constant time, Jeff Dean created the world's first O (1 / n) algorithm."

“One day in 2002, when the search back-end turned off, Jeff Dean manually answered user questions for two hours. During this period, the quality of search results has increased significantly. "

"Jeff Dean had to invent asynchronous APIs once, when, after his optimization, the function returned a value before it was called."

"Jeff Dean's programming speed increased 40 times at the end of 2000, when he upgraded his USB 2.0 keyboard."

“Compilers do not warn Jeffy Dean. Jeff Dean warns compilers. ”

“Jeff Dean once wrote the O (n ^ 2) algorithm. It was necessary to solve the traveling salesman problem. ”

“Jeff Dean once raised a web server with a single printf () call. Other engineers added thousands of comment lines with explanations, but did not understand how it works. Today, the program works as a Google Search frontend. ”

“When Jeff Dean launches the profiler, all cycles break in fear.”

“Jeff Dean is still waiting for the mathematicians to find the joke he hid in the digits of Pi.”

"On the keyboard, Jeff Dyn two keys: 1 and 0."

"The gcc-O4 command sends your code to Jeff Dean for complete rework."

"When Jeff can't fall asleep, he's map-rejuvenating sheep."

"When Jeff Dean wants to listen to an mp3, he sends it to / dev / dsp and performs decoding in his head."

"When Graham Bell invented the telephone, he saw a missed call from Jeff Dean."

"Jeff Dean puts his pants on each leg in turns, but if he had more than two legs, we would see that he needs O (log n)."

“At the Google interview, Jeff was asked what would follow from the equality P = NP. He replied: "P = 0 or N = 1." Then, while the interviewee had not stopped laughing, Jeff looked at Google’s public certificate and wrote a private key on the board. ”