Negrene furniture
Source: Copywriter's Blog
Copywriter Shnyrin sadly glanced at TK: “We need the text on the main page www.ofisplankton.ru . Firm "Officeplankton". It is necessary to convince the reader that our furniture is the best in its class and to encourage to make a purchase. Keywords: office furniture, office furniture, buy office furniture in Karmageddon, cheap office furniture. The density of all keys - 5%. 1000 - 1500 characters.
Shnyrin thought ... What does he know about density? It seems that the school took place ... The density is equal to the mass divided by volume. Sadly looking at the mirror door of the cabinet, he noticed that its volume and weight had increased significantly since he wrote off Chukryzhkina’s answers during the control tests on physics. “What is Natasha doing now?” Thought Shnyrin, scratching his belly. Thoughts took the copywriter farther into the past.
')
He recalled how, for the first time, he pulled Chukryzhkin for a red heavy braid, and how he received in response a weighty slap in the face; as carried two portfolios, seeing the chosen one up to the entrance; as at the graduation ball she gave him the first kiss, which was hot and wet in the armpits.
The hand was scratching its belly and dropping lower and lower, taking advantage of the absence of the host in real time. Intense blood flow to the groin made Shnyrin return to reality. “So, stop! We need to think about ordering! - He thought with annoyance. “What do I know about office furniture?”
The copywriter's scattered look wandered around the room, lingering on the subjects of a given subject matter. Here is a squeaky bed, a folding bed for some unexpected guest is gathering dust in the corner, a wardrobe is the only worthy representative of the furniture in his poorly furnished guest. Here, hardly suitable for comfortable work, a table with frozen coffee stains and cigarette burns. Under the fifth point, a chair on wheels was squeaking, written off from the editorial office of a local newspaper many years ago. The furnishings of the bedroom-study-room precluded any possibility of drawing text from life.
"All the better! After all, I am Central Asia - a potential buyer! ”- Shnyrin enthused. Rubbing his hands, he moved closer to the table; clicked the right mouse button, created a new file and proceeded:
“Elegant design, unsurpassed ergonomics, practicality in every line, reliability in every detail. This is not a new concept from Ferrari, it is office furniture from Officeplankton! To buy office furniture in Karmageddon, not overpaying, you can only in our company. Call 323-323-323 right now to make it to the fall sale! “Cheap office furniture” does not mean “lousy office furniture”. We do not sell horseradish! We sell non-fucking office furniture in Karmageddon. ”
Satisfied with the introduction, Shnyrin sipped from a long unwashed cup of long-cold tea and wanted to continue, but a crunch in his neck and a sharp back pain made him curl up for a few moments. "Oh shit! It’s time to buy normal furniture for work! ”Exclaimed the copywriter.
“Crunched back? Neck cramped? The tailbone burns and the joints crunch? Stop torturing yourself! Come to "Officeplanton" and buy a new cheap office furniture! No strength to reach? Call right now, order office furniture with home delivery and get 20 minutes of free massage! For buyers - charming masseuses. For buyers - muscular massage therapists.
Fantasy Shnyrina cleared in earnest. He already imagined sitting in a comfortable chair, and a sexy girl was standing behind him and kneading his neck with soft, warm hands.
“But that's not all! Buying office furniture in “Officeplankton”, you receive as a gift the latest development of our engineers - electric vibrating bedding for the chair! From now on, your buttocks will not numb, and hemorrhoids never knock on the back door! Hurry, call, come and buy office furniture that creates the perfect working atmosphere.
“Officeplanton” is probably the best choice of office furniture in Karmageddon! ”
“Uff! - exhaled Shnyrin, brushing sweat from his forehead. - sour worked. He sent the file by e-mail and decided to go to the balcony to smoke. A sudden click in the lower back made him fall into a chair.
Spewing out curses and moans, the copywriter got in a half-bent state to the telephone and dialed a freshly learned telephone. "Hello! Office plankton? Bring me the best, cheapest chair, bedding and masseuse! .. Yes, yes! This is urgent! Ogilvivskaya 8, apartment 5! ”- Shnyrin already squeaked the last words in a girlish voice.
Twenty minutes later, the front door trembled with heavy blows. The writer already crawled to the threshold and, lifting himself up with difficulty, snapped shutters.
At the site stood a hefty unshaven bomber in a working overalls:
“Did you order furniture, bedding and massage?”
In one hand he held a massive wooden stool, in the other a terry towel.
By Kopernik 11/02/2007
Copywriter Shnyrin sadly glanced at TK: “We need the text on the main page www.ofisplankton.ru . Firm "Officeplankton". It is necessary to convince the reader that our furniture is the best in its class and to encourage to make a purchase. Keywords: office furniture, office furniture, buy office furniture in Karmageddon, cheap office furniture. The density of all keys - 5%. 1000 - 1500 characters.
Shnyrin thought ... What does he know about density? It seems that the school took place ... The density is equal to the mass divided by volume. Sadly looking at the mirror door of the cabinet, he noticed that its volume and weight had increased significantly since he wrote off Chukryzhkina’s answers during the control tests on physics. “What is Natasha doing now?” Thought Shnyrin, scratching his belly. Thoughts took the copywriter farther into the past.
')
He recalled how, for the first time, he pulled Chukryzhkin for a red heavy braid, and how he received in response a weighty slap in the face; as carried two portfolios, seeing the chosen one up to the entrance; as at the graduation ball she gave him the first kiss, which was hot and wet in the armpits.
The hand was scratching its belly and dropping lower and lower, taking advantage of the absence of the host in real time. Intense blood flow to the groin made Shnyrin return to reality. “So, stop! We need to think about ordering! - He thought with annoyance. “What do I know about office furniture?”
The copywriter's scattered look wandered around the room, lingering on the subjects of a given subject matter. Here is a squeaky bed, a folding bed for some unexpected guest is gathering dust in the corner, a wardrobe is the only worthy representative of the furniture in his poorly furnished guest. Here, hardly suitable for comfortable work, a table with frozen coffee stains and cigarette burns. Under the fifth point, a chair on wheels was squeaking, written off from the editorial office of a local newspaper many years ago. The furnishings of the bedroom-study-room precluded any possibility of drawing text from life.
"All the better! After all, I am Central Asia - a potential buyer! ”- Shnyrin enthused. Rubbing his hands, he moved closer to the table; clicked the right mouse button, created a new file and proceeded:
“Elegant design, unsurpassed ergonomics, practicality in every line, reliability in every detail. This is not a new concept from Ferrari, it is office furniture from Officeplankton! To buy office furniture in Karmageddon, not overpaying, you can only in our company. Call 323-323-323 right now to make it to the fall sale! “Cheap office furniture” does not mean “lousy office furniture”. We do not sell horseradish! We sell non-fucking office furniture in Karmageddon. ”
Satisfied with the introduction, Shnyrin sipped from a long unwashed cup of long-cold tea and wanted to continue, but a crunch in his neck and a sharp back pain made him curl up for a few moments. "Oh shit! It’s time to buy normal furniture for work! ”Exclaimed the copywriter.
“Crunched back? Neck cramped? The tailbone burns and the joints crunch? Stop torturing yourself! Come to "Officeplanton" and buy a new cheap office furniture! No strength to reach? Call right now, order office furniture with home delivery and get 20 minutes of free massage! For buyers - charming masseuses. For buyers - muscular massage therapists.
Fantasy Shnyrina cleared in earnest. He already imagined sitting in a comfortable chair, and a sexy girl was standing behind him and kneading his neck with soft, warm hands.
“But that's not all! Buying office furniture in “Officeplankton”, you receive as a gift the latest development of our engineers - electric vibrating bedding for the chair! From now on, your buttocks will not numb, and hemorrhoids never knock on the back door! Hurry, call, come and buy office furniture that creates the perfect working atmosphere.
“Officeplanton” is probably the best choice of office furniture in Karmageddon! ”
“Uff! - exhaled Shnyrin, brushing sweat from his forehead. - sour worked. He sent the file by e-mail and decided to go to the balcony to smoke. A sudden click in the lower back made him fall into a chair.
Spewing out curses and moans, the copywriter got in a half-bent state to the telephone and dialed a freshly learned telephone. "Hello! Office plankton? Bring me the best, cheapest chair, bedding and masseuse! .. Yes, yes! This is urgent! Ogilvivskaya 8, apartment 5! ”- Shnyrin already squeaked the last words in a girlish voice.
Twenty minutes later, the front door trembled with heavy blows. The writer already crawled to the threshold and, lifting himself up with difficulty, snapped shutters.
At the site stood a hefty unshaven bomber in a working overalls:
“Did you order furniture, bedding and massage?”
In one hand he held a massive wooden stool, in the other a terry towel.
By Kopernik 11/02/2007
Source: https://habr.com/ru/post/15704/
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