Why I won't hire you

A friend of mine recently was actively looking for work, and asked me how to apply myself to an employer. Googling, we flipped through a dozen articles on how to do it and how not to do it during the search, and I decided to translate one of them for the habrasoobshchestvo, perhaps this will help someone to avoid the mistakes that are described in it. The manner of the article is quite provocative, the language is obscene in some places, so I tried to smooth the corners. So let's go. .

I will be honest with you - most of the articles about interviews describe only the most obvious mistakes, for example, that appearing late is a bad form. I will tell you things that I didn’t guess until I began to interview different people in different positions. No article can prepare you for how the person who came to you thinks - I came to this myself.

When you first come to my office, I expect that you are one of the 99 percent of people who I can talk to in five minutes that I’ll be able to say that you don’t fit me. But I still hope that you reconfigure me, and will have an interview. Unfortunately, most people come to interview for jobs that they are not worthy. Here are some ways to find out.
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You sent me a damn long resume

If I spend more than 30 seconds to read your resume - forget about the job, you pissed me off. For some reason, since the resumes were sent electronically, people began to think that they could write 10 pages of text about how good they were for this job, expecting me to read every word. Much more likely, I will ignore everything that has been written, I will make a note “Cannot speak briefly,” and continue to look at other options. Very rarely, if you have a really impressive list of skills, I can invite you for an interview, but you need to be damn good when talking face to face.

Think about it on my part - the summary tells me about your past, presumably in a compressed manner. If you can’t talk about this briefly, will I want to look at your messy letters every day in the future? If I can't finish reading your resume to the end, I probably won't be able to read the letters either.

If you are writing "Windows Administration", make at least one subitem in which you describe the successful project in which you used this skill. The subparagraph should be no longer than three sentences, the ideal is one sentence; if it is longer, you spend my time and yours in vain.

You cannot say why you love your current job.

I always ask people what they like most about their job before telling them about all the details of a job. I want to see if you can be happy at the new job. What if you can't answer this question for me, or answer with standard pattern phrases? Then forget about work, I have no idea what you want to do in life, and you seem to be too. Come to me when you know what you want to do. I will even be happy if I hear something like “this work is not impressive, but my previous work, where I really enjoyed doing (blablabla), and I miss it, and I think this work will remind me of this feeling ". Show that you are really interested, or do not waste my time in vain.

Worst answers? “I love challenging tasks” or similar nonsense. I have a bullshit detector, and most employers have one too. Worst of all, more than 50 percent of people say the same thing. If a person cannot deviate from the templates when telling why he loves his work, how can I be sure that you can be creative by working for me.

However, if you answer with standard answers (I like interesting tasks, grateful clients, etc.) - take the trouble to give an example from your practice that would really show how much you love it. I do not mind if it does not apply to future work, although it helps. Just be prepared that I can ask such a question - and in your best interest to have a good answer.

You have no plans for the future.

When I ask you about what your next job will be after the one you are interviewing, it is advisable to answer you. Everyone should have a vision of why you want to work for me. If you can tell me how work for me will help you move forward in your long-term plans, I understand that you have an incentive to work productively. If you just want to get this job, why should I take you, because someone else can come and tell me about their plans and vision of their progress.

A good answer is a well thought out development plan. You should have it anyway. Here is a good example: “I plan to progress from working in a small company to working in a large corporation with the possibility of growth. I would like to grow as a manager over the next 10 years, but my current company is too small for me to develop. (This job) will help me gain experience in management and communication, and help me grow as a leader and improve my skills. I would like to become a general manager "... and continue how this work will help you with this.

No relevant skills

Please do not disturb me if you do not have the necessary skills - I still find out. If you are a programmer, then you have to show skill at the interview, and show it well. If you are a project manager, you need to know how to build a project plan or project vision. Perhaps I will even give you a description of the project and ask you to build a plan right in front of me. Just because you think you can do it, and if you don’t meet, you waste my time. I will most likely be pleased if you, looking into my eyes, say that you agree to a lower position so that you have the opportunity to learn this. But it is better to indicate this in the summary in order not to waste time in vain.

If you come to me for an interview, and I expect that you are the administrator of UNIX systems, and you say: “I have read several books and would like to learn this in practice,” I will not like it. If, instead, you specify in the summary “I want to improve the skills in administering UNIX systems during the execution of projects”, I may invest some resources in your training in order to recruit you as a full-fledged employee. It's not bad if you indicate what you did to prepare, even if you do not fully satisfy the conditions. Do not make me any unpleasant surprises.

The answers to my questions with a guess

I will test you in different ways. I will ask you to tell about different situations from your life - when you had a failure, when success, when you loved and hated. Don't tell me what you would do in the future. I did not ask what you could do, I asked what you did. If I ask for an example, please give it to me. If you don’t have it, it’s ok, just tell me that you have never been in such a situation, but you have ideas if I want to hear them.

If you are not confident in yourself, spend some time training such situations. I never use options from the Internet, but it will help you not to get lost during the interview. I also will not mind if the candidate thinks for a while. I understand that everyone has their own way of answering questions and their own way of thinking.

The author is Charlie Ballmer, a businessman, blogger and consultant.

Special thanks to the unknown comrades who made the publication of this article possible.