Steve Pavlina - 30 days without Facebook
Not so long ago, the famous American blogger Steve Pavlina (Steve Pavlina) reported closing his Facebook page . Without going into details, let me remind you that this was caused by a large number of spam and the inconvenience of administering a highly visited account.
A month after this event, Steve shares his feelings about “life without Facebook”. Like all articles of Steve, the text contains quite controversial statements, but on the other hand, Steve never claimed objectivity. Anyway, the opinion of a person who has spent two years of intimate communication on Facebook and having about 8000 "friends" (including a fan page) is of particular interest.
In fact, the author expresses the general problems of social networks, and sometimes quite tough in the estimates. This is what gives some food for thought. Since Steve never differed in his brevity (besides, on the other side of the ocean, it is customary to repeat the same thing with different words several times, apparently, for better assimilation), I publish a short version of the article.
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When I broke up with Facebook, I noticed that the amount of communication in my life has decreased significantly. However, I did not feel a decrease in the flow of targeted, meaningful information. What I seemed to lose was mostly a lot of noise. Most posts are short, trivial and down to earth. Only some of them are wise or witty. Communication on Facebook gave a sense of action, in fact, we all just generated a useless noise.
Two years in a row, when something significant or just interesting happened in my life, I immediately shared it with the community. Gradually, the priority shifted in the wrong direction, when the value of the event itself turned out to be lower than its assessment by the network community. Now everything gradually falls into place. The desire to share an event has not disappeared, but it all weakens and is replaced by the growing desire to "be here and now", to fully participate in the events occurring in reality. I still like to share what is happening, but to do it thoughtfully, not impulsively.
Most of my posts on Facebook, apart from personal correspondence, I addressed not to anyone specific, but to the community as a whole. Even when I added something to a friend’s wall, I didn’t refer specifically to it. I also addressed all those present. Perhaps, if there were only 50-100 friends, I would not have the feeling that I communicate with a huge group, but with constant communication with 5,000 friends, everyone’s personality is erased. The advantage was that when I gave up on Facebook, I did not feel the loss of hundreds of friends. When I left, I noticed the absence of a community, but did not notice the absence of individual people.
It is believed that you are an introvert, if you recharge energy alone, and an extrovert, if on the contrary - draw strength, being in the company. Active communication on Facebook performed the social part of my energy exchange, as an extrovert. But in reality it was a false content, in fact, the feeling of “hunger of communication” remained. When I left Facebook, I began to feel more socially active when I left the house. Even when I was away on business, I noticed that I was happy to exchange a word or a joke with others. When I was active on Facebook, I did not do this because I was under the influence of a false sense of social activity, interacting with my online community.
In reality, the use of Facebook is the collection and / or viewing of meaningless information on your digital device (computer, phone, communicator, etc.). The phrase *** embrace *** - this is not a real hug. Graphic "smiley" - this is not a real human smile. I will go even further, stating that Facebook is not a social network. This is an anti-social project. If you do not agree with me, you can tell me this in person. If you are trying to discuss with me by typing your arguments on a digital device, you only confirm that I was right. Hard words, I know.
Most of my Facebook buddies were 20 years old. This created certain problems. I am capable of being a friend for a 20-year-old man, but there is too little chance that he will be a good friend for me. He simply does not have life experience, which forms the ability to share views on values ​​close to me, which I mean by true friendship. Most 20-year-olds are concerned about the problem of finding the meaning of life (and rightly so for their age) and are not able to provide me (who has already answered such questions) with meaningful help in what lies beyond these problems. I like to have young friends. But I also need more experienced friends, 40-50 year olds and older. I draw a lot from their wisdom and knowledge. The key is having the right balance. The problem with Facebook was that the percentage of young people was too large. Ask yourself what your life will look like if 80-90% of communication happens to people half the age of you. I am pleased to have several 20-year-old friends, but when there are hundreds of them, this is overkill. Thus, one of the reasons why I left Facebook was unjustified expectations to meet peers among my readers.
It's pretty obvious that the “friends” on the social network with whom you have to communicate on Facebook will mostly be ardent supporters of the service, spending a huge amount of hours and days on it. As a result, you will spend most of your time in the company of people with the worst impact — extremely unproductive, accustomed to spend hours in the network accustomed to spending hours. The closer you get with these people, the more time you give to the service. All the less productive is your own life.
Social networks make it easy to become socially lazy individuals. With a few clicks you can create the appearance of an active social life. What else could you have done during the time spent on the net? You could go to a dance or concert with your boyfriend or girlfriend. You have no one? It's amazing why ... Or you could spend time talking to a financially secure mentor about improving your financial situation. You have no successful friends? Strange ... Do you hope to meet them on Facebook? It's time to stop and evaluate the results achieved. Has social network changed your life for the better? Do you have new commercial contacts, valuable contacts and smart mentors? Or do you still go with the flow along with others, such losers.
I know that there is a common myth about the importance for business representation in social networks. Basically, this deception is spread by those who make money from it. Beware of tips about gold coming from a person trading in picks and shovels. With the increasing popularity of Facebook, your accessibility is also increasing. A variety of people either send you a personal message, or leave an inscription on the “wall”, or invite you to an event or to a group. This price was too high for me. I like helping people, but I cannot be a personal friend and a doctor at the same time for thousands of people. I see my appointment completely different.
Twitter does not create such accessibility issues. I still continue to use it. At the moment I am using Twitter to post messages addressed to a wide circle of readers. I rarely look through public messages addressed to me in response. Therefore, if you try to get my attention with a public comment on Twitter, it is likely that I will never see it.
If you have any doubts about the use of Facebook, I strongly recommend trying for a month to abandon it. Make it very easy, because Facebook allows (temporarily or permanently) to freeze your account without deleting data. So, if you later decide to come back, you can always log in and, with a few clicks, restore everything as it was before, including wall posts, photos, etc. I am by nature a supporter of testing. If you are an active Facebook user, spend 30 days without a service, you will gain a clearer idea of ​​its role in your life. In my case, after a few days, it became obvious that the benefits of using the service were not worth the effort, but there were some subtleties that I noticed only after a few weeks.
This is your life. It’s up to you to decide how high the return on your online activities is. Just do not do anything just because some services impose this behavior pattern on you.
As for me, I’m absolutely sure - I’m not planning to return to Facebook. Resistance is NOT useless.
*** hug *** :)
Original text: 30-day Facebook Fast
Full version of the translation: 30 days without Facebook
A month after this event, Steve shares his feelings about “life without Facebook”. Like all articles of Steve, the text contains quite controversial statements, but on the other hand, Steve never claimed objectivity. Anyway, the opinion of a person who has spent two years of intimate communication on Facebook and having about 8000 "friends" (including a fan page) is of particular interest.
In fact, the author expresses the general problems of social networks, and sometimes quite tough in the estimates. This is what gives some food for thought. Since Steve never differed in his brevity (besides, on the other side of the ocean, it is customary to repeat the same thing with different words several times, apparently, for better assimilation), I publish a short version of the article.
')
Facebook chat is mostly low-priority noise.
When I broke up with Facebook, I noticed that the amount of communication in my life has decreased significantly. However, I did not feel a decrease in the flow of targeted, meaningful information. What I seemed to lose was mostly a lot of noise. Most posts are short, trivial and down to earth. Only some of them are wise or witty. Communication on Facebook gave a sense of action, in fact, we all just generated a useless noise.
The desire to share information overshadows the value of the event.
Two years in a row, when something significant or just interesting happened in my life, I immediately shared it with the community. Gradually, the priority shifted in the wrong direction, when the value of the event itself turned out to be lower than its assessment by the network community. Now everything gradually falls into place. The desire to share an event has not disappeared, but it all weakens and is replaced by the growing desire to "be here and now", to fully participate in the events occurring in reality. I still like to share what is happening, but to do it thoughtfully, not impulsively.
Friends lose their individuality and become part of the community.
Most of my posts on Facebook, apart from personal correspondence, I addressed not to anyone specific, but to the community as a whole. Even when I added something to a friend’s wall, I didn’t refer specifically to it. I also addressed all those present. Perhaps, if there were only 50-100 friends, I would not have the feeling that I communicate with a huge group, but with constant communication with 5,000 friends, everyone’s personality is erased. The advantage was that when I gave up on Facebook, I did not feel the loss of hundreds of friends. When I left, I noticed the absence of a community, but did not notice the absence of individual people.
Facebook creates a false need for communication.
It is believed that you are an introvert, if you recharge energy alone, and an extrovert, if on the contrary - draw strength, being in the company. Active communication on Facebook performed the social part of my energy exchange, as an extrovert. But in reality it was a false content, in fact, the feeling of “hunger of communication” remained. When I left Facebook, I began to feel more socially active when I left the house. Even when I was away on business, I noticed that I was happy to exchange a word or a joke with others. When I was active on Facebook, I did not do this because I was under the influence of a false sense of social activity, interacting with my online community.
Facebook is an interaction with the computer, but not with people.
In reality, the use of Facebook is the collection and / or viewing of meaningless information on your digital device (computer, phone, communicator, etc.). The phrase *** embrace *** - this is not a real hug. Graphic "smiley" - this is not a real human smile. I will go even further, stating that Facebook is not a social network. This is an anti-social project. If you do not agree with me, you can tell me this in person. If you are trying to discuss with me by typing your arguments on a digital device, you only confirm that I was right. Hard words, I know.
A friend is not necessarily a "friend."
Most of my Facebook buddies were 20 years old. This created certain problems. I am capable of being a friend for a 20-year-old man, but there is too little chance that he will be a good friend for me. He simply does not have life experience, which forms the ability to share views on values ​​close to me, which I mean by true friendship. Most 20-year-olds are concerned about the problem of finding the meaning of life (and rightly so for their age) and are not able to provide me (who has already answered such questions) with meaningful help in what lies beyond these problems. I like to have young friends. But I also need more experienced friends, 40-50 year olds and older. I draw a lot from their wisdom and knowledge. The key is having the right balance. The problem with Facebook was that the percentage of young people was too large. Ask yourself what your life will look like if 80-90% of communication happens to people half the age of you. I am pleased to have several 20-year-old friends, but when there are hundreds of them, this is overkill. Thus, one of the reasons why I left Facebook was unjustified expectations to meet peers among my readers.
Facebook’s primary audience is “network addicts.”
It's pretty obvious that the “friends” on the social network with whom you have to communicate on Facebook will mostly be ardent supporters of the service, spending a huge amount of hours and days on it. As a result, you will spend most of your time in the company of people with the worst impact — extremely unproductive, accustomed to spend hours in the network accustomed to spending hours. The closer you get with these people, the more time you give to the service. All the less productive is your own life.
Facebook - communication for the lazy.
Social networks make it easy to become socially lazy individuals. With a few clicks you can create the appearance of an active social life. What else could you have done during the time spent on the net? You could go to a dance or concert with your boyfriend or girlfriend. You have no one? It's amazing why ... Or you could spend time talking to a financially secure mentor about improving your financial situation. You have no successful friends? Strange ... Do you hope to meet them on Facebook? It's time to stop and evaluate the results achieved. Has social network changed your life for the better? Do you have new commercial contacts, valuable contacts and smart mentors? Or do you still go with the flow along with others, such losers.
Facebook is an expensive way to become more visible.
I know that there is a common myth about the importance for business representation in social networks. Basically, this deception is spread by those who make money from it. Beware of tips about gold coming from a person trading in picks and shovels. With the increasing popularity of Facebook, your accessibility is also increasing. A variety of people either send you a personal message, or leave an inscription on the “wall”, or invite you to an event or to a group. This price was too high for me. I like helping people, but I cannot be a personal friend and a doctor at the same time for thousands of people. I see my appointment completely different.
What about Twitter?
Twitter does not create such accessibility issues. I still continue to use it. At the moment I am using Twitter to post messages addressed to a wide circle of readers. I rarely look through public messages addressed to me in response. Therefore, if you try to get my attention with a public comment on Twitter, it is likely that I will never see it.
Try to refuse Facebook for 30 days
If you have any doubts about the use of Facebook, I strongly recommend trying for a month to abandon it. Make it very easy, because Facebook allows (temporarily or permanently) to freeze your account without deleting data. So, if you later decide to come back, you can always log in and, with a few clicks, restore everything as it was before, including wall posts, photos, etc. I am by nature a supporter of testing. If you are an active Facebook user, spend 30 days without a service, you will gain a clearer idea of ​​its role in your life. In my case, after a few days, it became obvious that the benefits of using the service were not worth the effort, but there were some subtleties that I noticed only after a few weeks.
This is your life. It’s up to you to decide how high the return on your online activities is. Just do not do anything just because some services impose this behavior pattern on you.
As for me, I’m absolutely sure - I’m not planning to return to Facebook. Resistance is NOT useless.
*** hug *** :)
Original text: 30-day Facebook Fast
Full version of the translation: 30 days without Facebook
Source: https://habr.com/ru/post/116998/
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