Laziness (Mechanism, Part 2): Objectives
Usually, if you tell a techie why his device doesn't work the way he needs it, and in what places and what fault to look at, then a competent techie will really take care of this issue and fix everything. I made such assumptions by publishing the article “Laziness - Mechanism” . To my regret, the majority reaction turned out to be “Not working? Oh and good. I still feel good. ” In this regard, I will make an attempt to rehabilitate and try to even more chew this mechanism with specific examples and tips, however, no Habr will not contain such material in full, so I will break the material into parts. If this article will be in demand, I will write a sequel. Examples are devoted to students (the session is still soon).
For reasons of the previous article, we will analyze the “Goal” item (for a better understanding, refresh the previous article and the head).
')
Most of laziness is laid precisely the formation of points of reference and goals for them. These two points are always interrelated and very important for laziness.
Any goal that a person sets for himself is important for him and attractive to him. For their own purposes there is no laziness.
For example: You want yourself a brand new IPhone for which you have money. Hardly you will be too lazy to buy it.
Laziness itself, for the most part, is already a manifestation of highly complex models of social interaction, i.e. when a person sets goals not for himself, but someone tries to motivate him to achieve these goals, without reference to the person’s personality. As a result, the subconscious mind gives no motivation to waste resources, since the goal is not desired, is not necessary.
For example: Someone is telling you to take out the trash, but you are sitting at a computer and this trash can doesn’t bother you. Laziness will appear as a result.
An important point in the understanding of laziness is that it can be evaluated from different sides, in particular, someone may say that a person is lazy, although the person himself may not experience laziness. This is just the option of imposing goals. Then it is not just about laziness, but rather about disobedience.
If you pay attention, you will notice that almost all areas where you are lazy are somehow connected with other people: to do it for someone, to do it because someone said so, to do it because it is someone wants, etc.
These are goals that are not interesting to your subconscious, not interesting to you. And it is on the confrontation of the consciousness, which has the arguments to do, and the subconscious that says “no,” that the feeling of laziness originates.
It is easy to get rid of this feeling, if you get all the arguments of the subconscious and analyze them from the side of consciousness. Someone will win and laziness will disappear.
From this point of view, it is important to determine two facts:
1. Why are you ready to follow someone else's goals?
2. Are these goals really not satisfactory for you, are they really “not yours”?
Big analysis of an example:
The student goes to study at the university, but he is lazy to study .
Immediately I ask all students not to engage in self-projection, this is only a theoretical situation that may have completely different motives in your case.
Why don't you follow your goals?
If the student himself wanted to go to get knowledge in the university, it is for this specialty and it is for these subjects, then this is his goal - there will be no laziness.
If he went there because his parents said so, then his goal is not to learn, but “to make parents happy with me, because if they are not happy, then it will be bad for me”.
The goal of the student, not in learning, but in that he was not bad from their parents. That is what he will have and subconscious motivation, and it has nothing to do with knowledge.
On the other hand, the conscious part can say with the words of the parents: “You must graduate from the university to become a specialist, ....”. But this is not obvious to the subconscious. It may know that not all specialists have a higher education. If parents motivate with money that “will not be without a university”, then the subconscious may know that there are people with money and without a “tower”. There are many different variations.
If you pay attention to what subjects students like, then the motivation in these subjects is almost never associated with “getting a crust,” there is always a personal interest.
Now let us turn to our student in more detail: How does he understand that it will be bad for him if he does not follow the goals of his parents?
Will scold? Deprive pocket money? Handcuffed to the battery? Picked up in the trunk at night in the woods?
All of this, a description for a dependent person who depends on the opinions of parents, is not able to make independent decisions, is not able to provide himself financially, is not able to become an expert in an attractive field for him (without a pointer), is not able to look at his own future and evaluate possible outcomes, unable to answer for their own decisions.
If a person could do all this, he could easily explain his decision about not wanting to learn to his parents and save himself a few years of laziness. Well, or if he didn’t explain, he would make a willful decision and would be fully responsible for him, with a sense of pride and self-realization.
If a student trusts the opinion of his parents and, with his own consciousness, he perfectly understood and made sure that the goals that parents offer him really justify themselves, really bring “bonuses”, then the subconscious will accept it, and there will be a desire to learn (in case ).
Are these goals really not satisfactory, are they really “not yours”?
In the case of our student, this aspect may be manifested in the fact that the student may see his goals as recognizing himself as a specialist, communicating with smart people, managing a company or department, etc.
However, parents motivate a student to obtain a diploma, absolutely not explaining on a living example the interrelation of student goals with this diploma. If they try, or the student himself, can find supporting models of prediction, in which he believes that the goals offered by parents are directly interrelated with his personal goals, then laziness will disappear again (again, if it was for purposes).
Practical recommendations
If you, analyzing your situation with laziness, came to the decision that the cause is really the goal, the goal is not yours , but is imposed by someone, then do the following:
1. Find out who set this goal?
2. Find out why you are ready to consider the option for you to achieve this goal? What exactly is your interest to implement it?
3. Determine the real need for you in realizing this goal. Is the game worth the candle for you? If necessary, define a new goal and find an argument for it, taking into account the argument of the person who set this goal for you.
4. If you are satisfied with the adoption of a willful decision (and it is possible) to change the goal to yours, then accept it. You fully take responsibility for yourself in your life by accepting to fulfill those goals that you consider important to yourself.
5. If a volitional decision is not possible, then conduct a reasonable dialogue with the person who set the goal. If this person is interested in you, then explain to him that you do not see a direct relationship with this benefit for this purpose. Try to understand exactly how the person came to the conclusion that you need this goal. He did it anyway on his own experience, which you do not have. Find a compromise that will suit you completely, a new solution. This decision and take a subconscious, which will remove as a result of laziness towards the realization of the goal.
So “briefly” and in detail about such a simple element of laziness. I hope this will be enough for someone to take a closer look at their laziness.
From myself I would like to add that in the field of education “other people's goals” is a very frequent mechanism, primarily associated with a gap in understanding the mechanisms of human motivation among educators (parents, teachers, etc.). At first, this mechanism is really necessary when the child does not sufficiently understand the prospects for these goals, but sometimes, especially already at a conscious age, this is unnecessarily and even harms. This takes years of inefficient labor from a person who, as a result, will come to his goals anyway, only he could do it earlier and faster, since on any motivation everything is done.
The article was prepared in the framework of the project HS2.0 .
Successes you in realizing your goals)
For reasons of the previous article, we will analyze the “Goal” item (for a better understanding, refresh the previous article and the head).
')
Most of laziness is laid precisely the formation of points of reference and goals for them. These two points are always interrelated and very important for laziness.
Any goal that a person sets for himself is important for him and attractive to him. For their own purposes there is no laziness.
For example: You want yourself a brand new IPhone for which you have money. Hardly you will be too lazy to buy it.
Laziness itself, for the most part, is already a manifestation of highly complex models of social interaction, i.e. when a person sets goals not for himself, but someone tries to motivate him to achieve these goals, without reference to the person’s personality. As a result, the subconscious mind gives no motivation to waste resources, since the goal is not desired, is not necessary.
For example: Someone is telling you to take out the trash, but you are sitting at a computer and this trash can doesn’t bother you. Laziness will appear as a result.
An important point in the understanding of laziness is that it can be evaluated from different sides, in particular, someone may say that a person is lazy, although the person himself may not experience laziness. This is just the option of imposing goals. Then it is not just about laziness, but rather about disobedience.
If you pay attention, you will notice that almost all areas where you are lazy are somehow connected with other people: to do it for someone, to do it because someone said so, to do it because it is someone wants, etc.
These are goals that are not interesting to your subconscious, not interesting to you. And it is on the confrontation of the consciousness, which has the arguments to do, and the subconscious that says “no,” that the feeling of laziness originates.
It is easy to get rid of this feeling, if you get all the arguments of the subconscious and analyze them from the side of consciousness. Someone will win and laziness will disappear.
From this point of view, it is important to determine two facts:
1. Why are you ready to follow someone else's goals?
2. Are these goals really not satisfactory for you, are they really “not yours”?
Big analysis of an example:
The student goes to study at the university, but he is lazy to study .
Immediately I ask all students not to engage in self-projection, this is only a theoretical situation that may have completely different motives in your case.
Why don't you follow your goals?
If the student himself wanted to go to get knowledge in the university, it is for this specialty and it is for these subjects, then this is his goal - there will be no laziness.
If he went there because his parents said so, then his goal is not to learn, but “to make parents happy with me, because if they are not happy, then it will be bad for me”.
The goal of the student, not in learning, but in that he was not bad from their parents. That is what he will have and subconscious motivation, and it has nothing to do with knowledge.
On the other hand, the conscious part can say with the words of the parents: “You must graduate from the university to become a specialist, ....”. But this is not obvious to the subconscious. It may know that not all specialists have a higher education. If parents motivate with money that “will not be without a university”, then the subconscious may know that there are people with money and without a “tower”. There are many different variations.
If you pay attention to what subjects students like, then the motivation in these subjects is almost never associated with “getting a crust,” there is always a personal interest.
Now let us turn to our student in more detail: How does he understand that it will be bad for him if he does not follow the goals of his parents?
Will scold? Deprive pocket money? Handcuffed to the battery? Picked up in the trunk at night in the woods?
All of this, a description for a dependent person who depends on the opinions of parents, is not able to make independent decisions, is not able to provide himself financially, is not able to become an expert in an attractive field for him (without a pointer), is not able to look at his own future and evaluate possible outcomes, unable to answer for their own decisions.
If a person could do all this, he could easily explain his decision about not wanting to learn to his parents and save himself a few years of laziness. Well, or if he didn’t explain, he would make a willful decision and would be fully responsible for him, with a sense of pride and self-realization.
If a student trusts the opinion of his parents and, with his own consciousness, he perfectly understood and made sure that the goals that parents offer him really justify themselves, really bring “bonuses”, then the subconscious will accept it, and there will be a desire to learn (in case ).
Are these goals really not satisfactory, are they really “not yours”?
In the case of our student, this aspect may be manifested in the fact that the student may see his goals as recognizing himself as a specialist, communicating with smart people, managing a company or department, etc.
However, parents motivate a student to obtain a diploma, absolutely not explaining on a living example the interrelation of student goals with this diploma. If they try, or the student himself, can find supporting models of prediction, in which he believes that the goals offered by parents are directly interrelated with his personal goals, then laziness will disappear again (again, if it was for purposes).
Practical recommendations
If you, analyzing your situation with laziness, came to the decision that the cause is really the goal, the goal is not yours , but is imposed by someone, then do the following:
1. Find out who set this goal?
2. Find out why you are ready to consider the option for you to achieve this goal? What exactly is your interest to implement it?
3. Determine the real need for you in realizing this goal. Is the game worth the candle for you? If necessary, define a new goal and find an argument for it, taking into account the argument of the person who set this goal for you.
4. If you are satisfied with the adoption of a willful decision (and it is possible) to change the goal to yours, then accept it. You fully take responsibility for yourself in your life by accepting to fulfill those goals that you consider important to yourself.
5. If a volitional decision is not possible, then conduct a reasonable dialogue with the person who set the goal. If this person is interested in you, then explain to him that you do not see a direct relationship with this benefit for this purpose. Try to understand exactly how the person came to the conclusion that you need this goal. He did it anyway on his own experience, which you do not have. Find a compromise that will suit you completely, a new solution. This decision and take a subconscious, which will remove as a result of laziness towards the realization of the goal.
So “briefly” and in detail about such a simple element of laziness. I hope this will be enough for someone to take a closer look at their laziness.
From myself I would like to add that in the field of education “other people's goals” is a very frequent mechanism, primarily associated with a gap in understanding the mechanisms of human motivation among educators (parents, teachers, etc.). At first, this mechanism is really necessary when the child does not sufficiently understand the prospects for these goals, but sometimes, especially already at a conscious age, this is unnecessarily and even harms. This takes years of inefficient labor from a person who, as a result, will come to his goals anyway, only he could do it earlier and faster, since on any motivation everything is done.
The article was prepared in the framework of the project HS2.0 .
Successes you in realizing your goals)
Source: https://habr.com/ru/post/111638/
All Articles