Night grunts about Yandex, Market and interfaces in general
I love my wife. I love for everything, I guess. I love, but I do not understand. Perhaps, to understand women is something from the category of fiction. However, I want to understand. Here, for example, I want to understand why she uses Yandex. It would be desirable because millions of people use Yandex, and these people, perhaps, clients. Understand my wife - understand customers. Is it logical
I myself am a programmer with experience. So, I already do not understand much. Modernity rushes forward, and I still drive in echo and beat shift + tab. And if in the code I understand something, then in life already ... no!
I remember getting to know the laser printer. Long sought where it turns on. Prompted: behind the button. And I got up in a stupor: it’s necessary to reach out, bend over the printer, put your hand somewhere, grope and jerk, holding the printer with your other hand so that you do not fall off the shelf. But not going anywhere. Is that the printer I now have on the shelf sideways.
')
Now I wander through social networks. And their interface puts me in a similar stupor. I, for the life of me, do not understand how what can be done there. Here, you can insert a link on Facebook, and Facebook will immediately credit it, a picture, a text will be pulled out. And how to correct this text?
Walking inside Google. The same situation: here, an account has been created, the site has been checked for compliance with an account using the googlehostedservice.html file. But how to recheck? Where is the button? Run away somewhere.
And so, I sit down to see what Yandex is. He probably does not interest me as a search engine. Market is interesting to me. For a week now, as Serega has been screaming: so fill up the goods on the Market And for a week now I have been answering: why? And he told me: there will be more buyers. And I: it will be more visitors, and the grandmother told buyers. Moreover, it is paid. Vaughn, Google-shopping is free. He has already put me in all positions. And here Seryoga gives a murderous argument: Russian people use Yandex, but they don’t even know about Google at all what it is.
And I open the Yandex page.
For a long time I am looking for a link by which stores are registered. It is found at the very bottom of the page in the smallest font. Okay. Found it all the same. What grumble, if found?
Then I start to read the conditions. Mnogaubuff. I go, I smoke, I come back, I read again. Aha Need to register. And then the money - when the store will accept and approve. Well, let's try to go through the approval process.
I enter the data about myself, then I stick in, that I need to indicate the name of the IE and OGRNP on the site. Well, that's not a problem. Especially for those who read "1984". On the one hand, I seem to be legally working, I am not breaking anything. And on the other hand, our mutual friends can even find fault with a lamppost. Somehow I do not like this whole division of the Internet as lawyers. My motto: Internet is outlaw. And do not persuade.
He grumbled, pointed out the law to a separate page, went further along the list. So! It is necessary to cook YML. This is a file such XML, in which information on goods is thrown off. We know these nedoXML, which have not been heard about CDATA, - I think I download the sample file.
After a dozen file checks, it appears that:
1. The order of tags is very important to Yandex;
2. Yandex does not understand some tags indicated by it in the specification;
3. To find out about some tags and parameters, you need to read the specification to the end, then return to the desired page, then back, then two pages ahead ... and find that you forgot why these tags are needed;
4. For goods there is an optional tag that embodies information about the guarantee, which is mandatory;
5. This tag is for warranty information. Yandex does not understand.
This is a short list. There were more items in full, but they are not so funny.
Phew Yandex said “Ok” and made enable for the “Next” button. Come on. They came and we see that it is necessary for IP to specify the physical and legal address, which the PI may not have at all. Well, I do not have to IP somewhere to live. The idea of ​​being homeless in a car until you earn a million, I remember, Kiyosaki was still promoting.
Okay. Fortunately, I have two cars. There are plenty to choose from.
Filled all sent for review. No, do not want to check. Says that my delivery details are not listed. Hmm ... Funny, I think. How to specify? I have two delivery services, plus I travel sometimes. Always the price is different. And for free - this is how we agree.
Yandex is cruel in its approach: delivery is either one for all, or different for different products, or for free, when the order amount is at least something there.
Soft and cordial I, whose delivery depends even on the weather outside the window, is lost and writes timidly approximate weighted average 200 rubles, which in reality have a variance of one and a half and a half.
And suddenly I stumble on a field like "delivery regions". And ottoropev, timidly shake "Moscow". One could, of course, grab all of Russia. But it’s scary somehow: an hour isn’t even, someone from Kamchatka will order something at the price of 100 rubles, having seen the delivery at the price of 200. And then explain to him that even the Uzbeks don’t bring Kamchatka from Moscow for 200 rubles, that the post of Russia, which recently already two thousand hacked.
So, I poke Moscow, and I see some strange plus sign nearby. And under the plus sign - Zelenograd. Oh, my mommy, Zelenograd. This is ... this is ... I will say no offense to Zelenograd residents: you will forgive me, but you are far from Moscow. Moscow is here - inside the Moscow Ring Road. And what's outside - it's dark, if not worse. And delivery to Zelenograd is not entertainment for the hurried and the faint of heart (especially in the morning and in the evening, when you can walk on the highway and drivers sell cigarettes, crosswords and pillows for a nap).
Yandex no doubt considers Zelenograd part of Moscow. Okay, let him count. I am in Zelenograd or foot in any case.
Got a tick. Now caught, accepted. He poured himself another coffee, began to read, for what sins I can be sent back to Google. And the first thing that caught my eye was the discrepancy between the price of goods and the price on the site. Ghm ... The chip of my shop is the opportunity to bargain. I want to sell it to a kind person, but I don’t want to send it to far away and I won’t sell it at all. My business, with whom on fishing, and with whom in investigation. Well, wait and see. Yandex is not a decree. The site is worth a thousand, I can still give a good person for eight hundred. And let it not coincide.
The second. If I do not respond to an order for more than four hours, I will fall out of favor. Here's more news! And if I turned the store into automatic mode for a couple of days, and turned myself into out of order mode? Living clients understand this - I usually bring this information out in red and white on the site: they say, I went fishing with my friends; will be back on Monday in a week. And customers understand. They would not mind to go fishing like this. But Yandex probably does not understand. From his point of view, work is from the word “slavery”. From 10 to 18 and without rhinitis. Okay, scored. Does not understand - his problems.
The third, probably, I will not write - say that I carp. I already fiddled up a couple of pages of a slim one.
But grunts grunts. This is not my evil. It was someone who thought at four o'clock in the morning to turn off the light in the house without warning, which spoiled my mood. The main thing - the conclusion, which can be done. And I suggest the following conclusion: it is hard for young people to live. Small firms and ipeshechki spin as they want and often do not fall under world standards. More precisely, under the world (I'm talking about Google-shopping) fall. Under the family (read, Yandex) do not fall. If not officially registered - do not bother. If prices on the site do not have time to edit - do not poke your nose. Could not answer the phone on time - walk. Dead Internet or electricity turned off - do ten pushups.
Maybe it is correct in terms of service and quality of services, when Yandex doesn’t give the store a go for it. Yes, only everyone will be typed in the pocket for quality and service? And everyone wants to get out of the pit. And how to get out, if the growth is not suitable? A vicious circle in general.
Well, I started the procedure and went to sleep. And the next day a solid bloody environment began. I charged the phone two times. He screamed like a wounded lion every five minutes. "Good day. Can I order a Nosimoe 9127 bag? Can? And, yes, I mixed up, sorry, 0127. Is there any available? Are there two colors? How much is the delivery? How free? For me free? Thank". And then hang up. What kind of nonsense?
Towards evening, the ear was swollen and disturbed to walk.
Tired, I brewed coffee, sat at the computer and began to check what was going on with “my shops”. Yandex drew the following inscription: "The amount of payment for one order must be at least $ 10." What would it mean? What order? What is the payment? What is a sheepskin coat? Where did you go? Orders from my site should cost at least 10 killed raccoons each? Where was this said? If I could have deciphered for fools. Not everyone here present personally designed Yandex to guess the error by the first five letters of the local $ API-> ShowError ().
I drew an appeal to technical support with a request, if you don’t put a link to the detailed decoding of the secret message next to the error, then at least explain to me what this means.
Walking looked into the site statistics. Three thousand clicks on the button "put in the basket." Not bad. Another would be to click on "checkout" - it would be a good amount to pay. Although ... Why suddenly three thousand? I have products of all names five hundred from strength. Ay, alright. Three thousand and three thousand. Let it be.
After about half an hour of seeing this strange inscription, I found a yellow button somewhere on the right “Notifications: there are new ones”. Clicked and began to read.
Please note delivery information should be specified in more detail.
- Different delivery terms are shown in the partner interface and on the website.
Backpack large Nosimoe 0127
1 900 rub. available in the ontropinka.ru
Delivery: in Moscow? is free.
The site states: Courier in Moscow: Delivery by courier costs 200 rubles.
These errors may lead to incorrect uploading of data to the Market.
That's how it is! This was checked out from Market. And by stupidity they did not realize that I, with the aunt who had called, merely bargain as with any client. That is nonsense. Um ... but what to do? Ai, we will do everything that normal people do: spit it up.
And here came the decoding of the strange inscription about the order. It turns out that Yandex wanted money. I dropped the money to him in some strange way: first on the Yandex-wallet, then I already paid the store from the wallet. Yandex counted wooden raccoons and left a few kopecks in their wallet that they could not measure with raccoons.
The store wrote that it "starts." And that's all. No deadline for when to expect. No buttons "see what's what." Clicked "Bid Management". "You can manage rates, the rates will become active when the store starts," Yandex said. The following was the inscription "All products" and the search string. Whatever I drove in there, Yandex kept saying “no”. Dope Everyone knows what a list with padzhinatsii. Or at least the number of available products. Or at least the inscription "goods yet, wait until tomorrow."
Tomorrow the store woke up. And somehow immediately the goods appeared in the Market. By yourself. Without any bid. Intuitively I found out that by default the bet is always set and the minimum amount is one tenth of the raccoon.
And then it turned out that Yandex perceives goods with slightly different names as different. And sometimes even the picture does not grab. Wrote about this in tech support. Their tech support is entertaining - she reacts to letters. And there are no forms for communication on the site. I once communicated with someone through forms - it was nice. The whole dialogue on the screen is visible. You can read back and forth for a better understanding of the subject. And so - an avalanche of letters that need to be independently raked. However, the response speed of Yandex support is good - they responded almost immediately.
They replied that a bug had surfaced at Yandex itself, that they were fighting with it, that they were solving the problem. Reassured. Half an hour later, the goods hit the product card. Nicely.
The picture sucked after four hours - with this they have a delay. They explained that they intercept the XML immediately, and the pictures drown a little later and for quite a while. Well, it is good that they drown in the end.
The brain is quietly relaxed, the boil has passed, the ear is still aching. A weakness spread through the body. And so I sit and think. Still, I love my wife. Though I do not understand. How she gives pleasure to what torments me. Strange creatures of these women.
PS And about how Yandex will promote my products, how things will go with it to us - this will probably be a grinder in a month, probably.
I myself am a programmer with experience. So, I already do not understand much. Modernity rushes forward, and I still drive in echo and beat shift + tab. And if in the code I understand something, then in life already ... no!
I remember getting to know the laser printer. Long sought where it turns on. Prompted: behind the button. And I got up in a stupor: it’s necessary to reach out, bend over the printer, put your hand somewhere, grope and jerk, holding the printer with your other hand so that you do not fall off the shelf. But not going anywhere. Is that the printer I now have on the shelf sideways.
')
Now I wander through social networks. And their interface puts me in a similar stupor. I, for the life of me, do not understand how what can be done there. Here, you can insert a link on Facebook, and Facebook will immediately credit it, a picture, a text will be pulled out. And how to correct this text?
Walking inside Google. The same situation: here, an account has been created, the site has been checked for compliance with an account using the googlehostedservice.html file. But how to recheck? Where is the button? Run away somewhere.
And so, I sit down to see what Yandex is. He probably does not interest me as a search engine. Market is interesting to me. For a week now, as Serega has been screaming: so fill up the goods on the Market And for a week now I have been answering: why? And he told me: there will be more buyers. And I: it will be more visitors, and the grandmother told buyers. Moreover, it is paid. Vaughn, Google-shopping is free. He has already put me in all positions. And here Seryoga gives a murderous argument: Russian people use Yandex, but they don’t even know about Google at all what it is.
And I open the Yandex page.
For a long time I am looking for a link by which stores are registered. It is found at the very bottom of the page in the smallest font. Okay. Found it all the same. What grumble, if found?
Then I start to read the conditions. Mnogaubuff. I go, I smoke, I come back, I read again. Aha Need to register. And then the money - when the store will accept and approve. Well, let's try to go through the approval process.
I enter the data about myself, then I stick in, that I need to indicate the name of the IE and OGRNP on the site. Well, that's not a problem. Especially for those who read "1984". On the one hand, I seem to be legally working, I am not breaking anything. And on the other hand, our mutual friends can even find fault with a lamppost. Somehow I do not like this whole division of the Internet as lawyers. My motto: Internet is outlaw. And do not persuade.
He grumbled, pointed out the law to a separate page, went further along the list. So! It is necessary to cook YML. This is a file such XML, in which information on goods is thrown off. We know these nedoXML, which have not been heard about CDATA, - I think I download the sample file.
After a dozen file checks, it appears that:
1. The order of tags is very important to Yandex;
2. Yandex does not understand some tags indicated by it in the specification;
3. To find out about some tags and parameters, you need to read the specification to the end, then return to the desired page, then back, then two pages ahead ... and find that you forgot why these tags are needed;
4. For goods there is an optional tag that embodies information about the guarantee, which is mandatory;
5. This tag is for warranty information. Yandex does not understand.
This is a short list. There were more items in full, but they are not so funny.
Phew Yandex said “Ok” and made enable for the “Next” button. Come on. They came and we see that it is necessary for IP to specify the physical and legal address, which the PI may not have at all. Well, I do not have to IP somewhere to live. The idea of ​​being homeless in a car until you earn a million, I remember, Kiyosaki was still promoting.
Okay. Fortunately, I have two cars. There are plenty to choose from.
Filled all sent for review. No, do not want to check. Says that my delivery details are not listed. Hmm ... Funny, I think. How to specify? I have two delivery services, plus I travel sometimes. Always the price is different. And for free - this is how we agree.
Yandex is cruel in its approach: delivery is either one for all, or different for different products, or for free, when the order amount is at least something there.
Soft and cordial I, whose delivery depends even on the weather outside the window, is lost and writes timidly approximate weighted average 200 rubles, which in reality have a variance of one and a half and a half.
And suddenly I stumble on a field like "delivery regions". And ottoropev, timidly shake "Moscow". One could, of course, grab all of Russia. But it’s scary somehow: an hour isn’t even, someone from Kamchatka will order something at the price of 100 rubles, having seen the delivery at the price of 200. And then explain to him that even the Uzbeks don’t bring Kamchatka from Moscow for 200 rubles, that the post of Russia, which recently already two thousand hacked.
So, I poke Moscow, and I see some strange plus sign nearby. And under the plus sign - Zelenograd. Oh, my mommy, Zelenograd. This is ... this is ... I will say no offense to Zelenograd residents: you will forgive me, but you are far from Moscow. Moscow is here - inside the Moscow Ring Road. And what's outside - it's dark, if not worse. And delivery to Zelenograd is not entertainment for the hurried and the faint of heart (especially in the morning and in the evening, when you can walk on the highway and drivers sell cigarettes, crosswords and pillows for a nap).
Yandex no doubt considers Zelenograd part of Moscow. Okay, let him count. I am in Zelenograd or foot in any case.
Got a tick. Now caught, accepted. He poured himself another coffee, began to read, for what sins I can be sent back to Google. And the first thing that caught my eye was the discrepancy between the price of goods and the price on the site. Ghm ... The chip of my shop is the opportunity to bargain. I want to sell it to a kind person, but I don’t want to send it to far away and I won’t sell it at all. My business, with whom on fishing, and with whom in investigation. Well, wait and see. Yandex is not a decree. The site is worth a thousand, I can still give a good person for eight hundred. And let it not coincide.
The second. If I do not respond to an order for more than four hours, I will fall out of favor. Here's more news! And if I turned the store into automatic mode for a couple of days, and turned myself into out of order mode? Living clients understand this - I usually bring this information out in red and white on the site: they say, I went fishing with my friends; will be back on Monday in a week. And customers understand. They would not mind to go fishing like this. But Yandex probably does not understand. From his point of view, work is from the word “slavery”. From 10 to 18 and without rhinitis. Okay, scored. Does not understand - his problems.
The third, probably, I will not write - say that I carp. I already fiddled up a couple of pages of a slim one.
But grunts grunts. This is not my evil. It was someone who thought at four o'clock in the morning to turn off the light in the house without warning, which spoiled my mood. The main thing - the conclusion, which can be done. And I suggest the following conclusion: it is hard for young people to live. Small firms and ipeshechki spin as they want and often do not fall under world standards. More precisely, under the world (I'm talking about Google-shopping) fall. Under the family (read, Yandex) do not fall. If not officially registered - do not bother. If prices on the site do not have time to edit - do not poke your nose. Could not answer the phone on time - walk. Dead Internet or electricity turned off - do ten pushups.
Maybe it is correct in terms of service and quality of services, when Yandex doesn’t give the store a go for it. Yes, only everyone will be typed in the pocket for quality and service? And everyone wants to get out of the pit. And how to get out, if the growth is not suitable? A vicious circle in general.
Well, I started the procedure and went to sleep. And the next day a solid bloody environment began. I charged the phone two times. He screamed like a wounded lion every five minutes. "Good day. Can I order a Nosimoe 9127 bag? Can? And, yes, I mixed up, sorry, 0127. Is there any available? Are there two colors? How much is the delivery? How free? For me free? Thank". And then hang up. What kind of nonsense?
Towards evening, the ear was swollen and disturbed to walk.
Tired, I brewed coffee, sat at the computer and began to check what was going on with “my shops”. Yandex drew the following inscription: "The amount of payment for one order must be at least $ 10." What would it mean? What order? What is the payment? What is a sheepskin coat? Where did you go? Orders from my site should cost at least 10 killed raccoons each? Where was this said? If I could have deciphered for fools. Not everyone here present personally designed Yandex to guess the error by the first five letters of the local $ API-> ShowError ().
I drew an appeal to technical support with a request, if you don’t put a link to the detailed decoding of the secret message next to the error, then at least explain to me what this means.
Walking looked into the site statistics. Three thousand clicks on the button "put in the basket." Not bad. Another would be to click on "checkout" - it would be a good amount to pay. Although ... Why suddenly three thousand? I have products of all names five hundred from strength. Ay, alright. Three thousand and three thousand. Let it be.
After about half an hour of seeing this strange inscription, I found a yellow button somewhere on the right “Notifications: there are new ones”. Clicked and began to read.
Please note delivery information should be specified in more detail.
- Different delivery terms are shown in the partner interface and on the website.
Backpack large Nosimoe 0127
1 900 rub. available in the ontropinka.ru
Delivery: in Moscow? is free.
The site states: Courier in Moscow: Delivery by courier costs 200 rubles.
These errors may lead to incorrect uploading of data to the Market.
That's how it is! This was checked out from Market. And by stupidity they did not realize that I, with the aunt who had called, merely bargain as with any client. That is nonsense. Um ... but what to do? Ai, we will do everything that normal people do: spit it up.
And here came the decoding of the strange inscription about the order. It turns out that Yandex wanted money. I dropped the money to him in some strange way: first on the Yandex-wallet, then I already paid the store from the wallet. Yandex counted wooden raccoons and left a few kopecks in their wallet that they could not measure with raccoons.
The store wrote that it "starts." And that's all. No deadline for when to expect. No buttons "see what's what." Clicked "Bid Management". "You can manage rates, the rates will become active when the store starts," Yandex said. The following was the inscription "All products" and the search string. Whatever I drove in there, Yandex kept saying “no”. Dope Everyone knows what a list with padzhinatsii. Or at least the number of available products. Or at least the inscription "goods yet, wait until tomorrow."
Tomorrow the store woke up. And somehow immediately the goods appeared in the Market. By yourself. Without any bid. Intuitively I found out that by default the bet is always set and the minimum amount is one tenth of the raccoon.
And then it turned out that Yandex perceives goods with slightly different names as different. And sometimes even the picture does not grab. Wrote about this in tech support. Their tech support is entertaining - she reacts to letters. And there are no forms for communication on the site. I once communicated with someone through forms - it was nice. The whole dialogue on the screen is visible. You can read back and forth for a better understanding of the subject. And so - an avalanche of letters that need to be independently raked. However, the response speed of Yandex support is good - they responded almost immediately.
They replied that a bug had surfaced at Yandex itself, that they were fighting with it, that they were solving the problem. Reassured. Half an hour later, the goods hit the product card. Nicely.
The picture sucked after four hours - with this they have a delay. They explained that they intercept the XML immediately, and the pictures drown a little later and for quite a while. Well, it is good that they drown in the end.
The brain is quietly relaxed, the boil has passed, the ear is still aching. A weakness spread through the body. And so I sit and think. Still, I love my wife. Though I do not understand. How she gives pleasure to what torments me. Strange creatures of these women.
PS And about how Yandex will promote my products, how things will go with it to us - this will probably be a grinder in a month, probably.
Source: https://habr.com/ru/post/110403/
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